


Catalyst

by BleedingCoffee



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: AU, Both of them, F/M, Royai - Freeform, Royai Week 2017, death of hughes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-02-11 11:22:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 32,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12934206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BleedingCoffee/pseuds/BleedingCoffee
Summary: A Life as We Know It AU where Roy and Riza become guardians for Elicia after her parents die. No greater catalyst in Roy's life than the death of Hughes and here he has no choice but to dedicate himself to parenthood instead of revenge.





	1. Tragedy

**Author's Note:**

> Rating: Teen for cursing and innuendo. The usual.
> 
> Summary: A Life as We Know It AU where Roy and Riza become guardians for Elicia after her parents die. No greater catalyst in Roy's life than the death of Hughes and here he has no choice but to dedicate himself to parenthood instead of revenge.
> 
> AN: This was a request that turned into a WIP that turned into a submission for 2017 Royai Week Prompt: Day 3 Catalyst. I swear, this one is edited, chaptered up and already uploaded and ready to go. It's complete and I'm just cleaning up some older fics to clear the way to work on others.

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 1

**Tragedy**

* * *

Roy sat awkwardly in the lawyer's office and did his best to keep his emotions under control. It was easier to maintain decorum when in uniform; there was something about the crisp gabardine and ceremonial accessories that made him maintain military protocol despite his internal desire to break down and just mourn the loss of good man. A better man. A man more worthy of a good life than him. His best friend.

The uniform always managed to allow him to hide inside it's protective shroud and that was nothing new. He felt it the first time he ever put it on; the swell of pride, the honor and pageantry, the conformity. He used it to find his own strength, to forge his way and mold himself and he also used it to deflect the blame for his actions. Now he struggled to not use it again to absorb the blame, this time for costing Maes Hughes his life.

He stood up and went to the window, folded his hands behind his back and tried to chase away the tears beginning to form. He just needed to get through one more official engagement for the evening and then he could shed this uniform, along with all the protections and standards it represented, and find a bar to drink away his pain. First the wake, then the funeral, now this 'urgent' meeting with Maes's lawyer. This day was never going to end.

* * *

Riza felt Elicia's hand squeeze harder as she readjusted the car sear through the opened car door. She bent down to the little baby girl and said, "It's OK. I have to talk with the lawyer about something and I'll come over and join you and Hayate in the park. You can trust my grandfather, he's weird but he's a grandpa. Grandpas are always funny and weird right?"

Grumman chuckled and made a goofy face for the baby who was tired and fussy. Riza talked with her like she talked to her dog, the poor girl was trying so hard.

Riza braced herself as Elicia started crying again. She was still reeling from the news that her friend Gracia had been murdered when the hospital called. She didn't know Gracia had left her name as an emergency contact, but it made sense, all her other friends were hardly capable of taking care of a baby. "This is important, I think it's about you. OK?"

"Go." Grumman said and reached out and shook a pill bottle, a makeshift rattle. He watched the baby focus on it as well as the dog. "Not for babies or puppies, just old men."

Riza looked up at her grandfather who was apparently going to entertain the baby with his medication. She didn't want to look too closely at the label to find out which medication it was. "I think she'll settle down if you drive a little."

"I know more about babies than you think Riza." Grumman chuckled as she closed the door.

Riza sighed. "Know more than I do."

"Miss Hawkeye?" The lawyer, a Roger Colerain, stepped out of his office building and looked at the woman on the sidewalk. He opened the door for her, trying to illustrate his impatience. "We are waiting on you."

She took a deep breath and tried to not snap at the man. It wasn't his fault she didn't know that much about babies and had to stop at the store for diaper rash medication. It was an affront on her professionalism, she was  _never_  late. Still, she wanted this over with and the sooner the better. "Sorry sir."

Colerain held the door long enough for her to get in the building and then let go, hurrying past her. "My office is down the hall."

Riza watched him rush down the carpeted hallway and took slightly smaller strides than she normally did. His attitude was screaming how inconvenienced he was and it was beyond rude. So she made him wait as he held the door open to his office and stepped inside slowly, it was then that she noticed there was someone else waiting. She recognized him from photos all over the Hughes home. It was Maes's best friend, the man he so desperately wanted to set her up with. "Sorry, I didn't know someone else was waiting on me."

Roy watched the lawyer huff dramatically and circle around to his side of the desk. He wanted to be the asshole Colonel right now and rip into him about his less than professional demeanor, but he needed to be level headed for whatever this was about, he owed that to Maes. "It's not a problem. I'm Roy, Maes's friend."

"I'm Riza. I am friends with Gracia." She said and shook his hand. She almost corrected herself and said 'was' but the lawyer opened up a folder and they both sat down.

"As you know, Mr. and Mrs. Hughes were very dedicated to their daughter." Colerain said and pulled out a packet of papers and sit it down in front of the two. "In the event of their death they made provisions for little Elicia. They left custody of her to you."

" _You_  who?" Roy asked and leaned over the paper as the man's eyes darted between him and Riza.

Riza looked at the paper and saw it typed out in bold back ink: 'Custody of Elicia Hughes would be  _shared_  between Roy Mustang and Riza Hawkeye until she was 18.' She stared at it. Taking Elicia after the news of Gracia and Maes's death was one thing, taking her for 18 years...

"He never said anything about this." Roy said and looked up at the lawyer. His heart almost stopped. Custody of a baby? His best friend's baby? Maes knew damned well he was barely a functioning adult, why the hell would he do this to his kid?

"Unfortunately there may not have been a time to discuss this with you since it was drawn up less than two months ago." Colerain put a pen on the paper. "People always think they have all the time in the world."

Riza read that line again. " _Shared_  custody?"

"Mr. Hughes believed his friend to be the most suitable father, Mrs. Hughes felt you to be the best option as a mother. They argued and came to an agreement that shared custody would be best for their daughter and also both of you." Colerain explained.

"That's...so fucking like Maes." Roy said and sat back in the chair. Holy shit, the man was trying to shove him together with this woman even in death!

Riza looked at Roy. The man who had been asleep drunk on the Hughes's couch on more than one occasion when she visited. "I know nothing about babies or this man."

"Mr. and Mrs. Hughes left the house to Elicia, which she will inherit upon turning 18. In the meantime they felt it best for their daughter to be raised in the environment they created for her." Colerain said. "There may have also had some questions about the health violations of your apartment Colonel, and the spartan and minuscule size of your apartment Lieutenant."

"I have to take that shit from him, not you." Roy snapped.

"Spartan..." Riza rebuked that.

"I am not here to argue about this, just get the paperwork signed." Colerain took out letters the deceased had written and handed them to each of the people opposite of him. "They left you letters explaining their choices and wishes. Each parent had their reservations about the other's choice, and the compromise was in choosing both of you for the task. You will inhabit the Hughes home together and provide for the child. There is ample room for each of you to live separate from each other while still being together to be the parents this little girl lost."

Roy reluctantly took the letter, knowing he would cave reading words from his best friend. He looked over at Riza who wore a similar look on her face. He took a deep breath and focused on the letter and started to read, hoping it wouldn't drive tears from his eyes that he had been holding back all day.


	2. Duty

 

 

 

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 2

**Duty**

* * *

Jean Havoc lifted up Elicia and cradled her in his arms. He picked up the bottle and placed it close to her mouth so when she stopped crying he could count on her instinctive response to nurse. It worked like a charm. "See, nothing to it. And I thought you were good with women."

"I'm usually the one sucking nipples." Roy said and Jean rolled his eyes.

"You have to stop acting like a bachelor and start acting like a father." Jean passed the baby over and Roy carefully held her and the bottle like she was made of porcelain. He had never seen the Colonel look so unsure of himself, so timid about anything. "The biggest secret about being a parent is that nobody knows what they're doing. Nobody is prepared for it like they think they are. Everyone learns along the way."

"I am terrible with kids. I'm useless."

"If Hughes thought that he would have left the kid to me." Havoc replied. He had been raised in a large family and it was normal for cousins and sisters to have kids around and everyone help. He forgot that wasn't Mustang's childhood.

Roy held Elicia and watched her suck away and wondered how useless he was really going to be with this monumental task of raising Maes's baby. The letter that the lawyer handed him had been simple, he knew that Maes had intended to write something else later on after talking with him.  _I know you'd give your life to save mine, so if you're reading this letter I need you to give your life to saving my Elicia from a life without her parents. I believe in you Roy, more than you believe in yourself, you'll be great._

"So how is this going to work, Chief?" Havoc asked and pulled out a cigarette as he leaned on the arm of the couch. This was the Hughes's home, warm and welcoming, the very picture of what a home should be. He placed the cigarette on his lips but didn't light it. "You and Lieutenant Hawkeye  _living together_  and raising a kid?"

"There are three bedrooms." Roy said and Elicia started to suck air out of the bottle prompting Jean to come over and take her back.

"You can't let her suck air or she'll get colicky." Jean informed him and proceeded to hoist the baby on his shoulder and burp her.

"Colic?" Roy watched him walk around with the little girl, a natural at this. Humans could colic? He thought that was only horses. _Holy shit_  he was in way over his head. He had no idea how to hold a baby more or less feed one without killing her!

"Yeah." Jean wandered over to the simple bookshelf as he bounced the baby and looked for a parenting or baby book that Hughes  _had_  to have. This shelf was all picture albums. The  _whole_  shelf. He turned as he heard the front door open and looked at a surprised blond woman who was holding a brown paper bag and had a dog by her side.  _Fuck Mustang_! He was being forced to live with a ridiculously beautiful woman in the Amestrian dream home! The  _son of a bitch_! "Hi. You must be Hawkeye."

Riza blinked. Maybe this wouldn't be such a bad deal if the babysitter was this handsome, muscled man walking around the living room in a black T shirt that could have been painted on him. Those shoulders...what a lucky baby to be resting her head on those. "Yes, and you are?"

"Jean Havoc." He walked over with the baby and held out his hand. "I work for Mustang."

"I hear he needs a babysitter." Riza smiled and a few inappropriate thoughts went through her head about Havoc before Roy walked into view. He had shed his dress uniform and was now in a white shirt with his sleeves rolled up and his hair no long slicked back. He looked lost. Gracia had written in her letter that she didn't want Elicia growing up without a mother, knowing full well that would hit home, but then she went on to ask that Roy be given a chance. That he was more than just some old academy buddy to Maes, that Elicia needed a father in her life to spoil her like Maes would. They left the lawyers office with keys in hand to the Hughes place, she went to the store for formula and he took Elicia since she had been with the baby since the accident. Clearly he didn't last very long before calling for help. "Sorry."

"Nothing I haven't heard in this house before." Roy said and reached for the liquor cabinet and chose something that  _he_  could nurse on for a while. He was trying to avoid looking at the pictures on the wall, trying to avoid the reminder that he buried his friend this morning and was now going to spend the night in his house. He poured a glass and quickly emptied it into his mouth. When he woke up in the morning on the couch, Maes wouldn't be there with a smile and a cup of coffee. Maes was never coming home.

Jean saw the disapproval in Hawkeye's eyes as Roy helped himself to some of his own medicine. He wanted to sympathize with the man, he lost his best friend, but there was a baby to worry about now. "OK Chief, next class in Baby 101 is leaning how to change diapers."

"I know nothing about kids, but there is no way that bottle of milk could be processed that fast." Roy said and put the glass down and walked over to the man in charge here.

"Someone's been feeding her." Jean said and waved the baby at Mustang and watched his face pale.

"Feeding her what? Good god!" Roy covered his nose.

"Breast milk." Riza answered and watched Roy's face display a range of emotions that started with surprise and ended with an immediate glance at her cleavage. " _Not_  mine."

Jean laughed. "God Mustang,  _in the fridge._  Like  _half_ the fridge. Might want to freeze some of it."

"Right." He said and bent down to pet the dog Hawkeye brought. He was good with dogs. The dog wagged his tail and leaned into has hand as he scratched his ears.

"Let's change her first and put her to bed." Jean nudged him. "Then we can talk about what you can expect as a new parent tonight."

Riza felt the shock waves of that statement the same as Mustang. He looked up at her, curious to see if she was as affected by it as he was. They were parents now, parents of a little girl that had been the center of her own parents universe and now was stuck with two strangers who knew nothing about babies or each other.

* * *

"She's still asleep?" Roy asked as Riza finally came into the living room and sat down on the couch.

"Yes." She said and realized she had just been avoiding talking with him most of the night. She got settled into the guest bedroom after picking up a few necessities at her house. Roy had announced he was just going to sleep on the couch, which seemed to be his comfort zone anyway. Neither of them wanted to go back into the bedroom that belonged to a now deceased couple. It had been hard enough to go through their closet for clothes for the funeral. "Your friend Jean was great with her."

"He's big on family." Roy said and sat back with a glass in his hand and stared at the fire across the room. "Lots of nieces and nephews back home on the farm. Mrs. Havoc had a lot of kids and he had to help with brothers and sisters too."

They sat in silence for a while and she finally looked over at him as he toyed with his empty glass, looking at the flames through it. "So how is this going to work? Are we really going to move in here and raise Elicia?"

"I can't speak for you, but I won' let Maes down. If this was what he wanted, I'll do my best to make it happen." Roy put the glass down and remained fixated on the fire to avoid looking at the huge wedding photo hanging over the fireplace. "I don't know anything about kids though. I never even held her until tonight. I've never held any baby before."

"Gracia asked me to do this, I won't let Elicia grow up without a Mom." Riza said and leaned back into the couch. She wasn't going to divulge why that hit her so hard, she didn't know this man at all. "We can do this for her, can't we?"

"Yeah." Roy said and knew it sounded weak.

"You don't sound so confident Colonel." She said and he looked at her with watery eyes.

"I can't even come close to being Maes." Roy said and sighed. "She's never going to know him. Elicia is never going to know what she missed out on."

Riza looked up at the picture on the wall. A happy couple, the happiest and healthiest relationship she had ever seen. "How do we do this? We both have jobs."

"We'll have to interview sitters." Roy said. "I can take some time off next week to figure things out."

"I...can't." She said. Her vacation was already used up and any time off wasn't paid anymore. "I make a Lieutenant's salary and babies are expensive."

"I waste most of my income anyhow, I think I can put more towards someone who deserves it." Roy said and put the glass down. His lifestyle was no secret to anyone. That was the whole point, but somewhere along the way he got himself in too deep in the charade and began to use it as a distraction. That was all going to have to change immediately. Time would be lacking, money needed to be wisely spent and reputation needed to be cleaned up. He was really unsure about all this now.

"That's not fair." She said. "We are in this together and that means shared everything."

"Riza, none of this is fair." Roy said. "I think we both know you're going to be better with her than me and I might as well offer what I can which is finances."

"Why do you think that? Because I'm a woman I have to be better with the baby?" She asked.

"You took her after the accident and I assumed since you didn't call for help immediately like I did." He didn't mean to make it sound like that. "Plus, you have a dog and he's clearly happy and been raised well."

"I called my grandfather for help." She admitted. "Gracia was the only friend I had with a baby and I didn't exactly beg to hold Elicia when I visited. I never changed a diaper before this weekend. I had no idea that was breast milk in the fridge, I have no idea how she could  _make_  all that. It's like a dairy in there."

"No kidding!" Roy said and gave her a smile and they both relaxed a little.

"I don't know what I'm doing, I just know that my first instinct is to call Gracia and...she's not going to answer."

"Same here." Roy said and instinctively reached for his glass again. "For years Maes called me every damned day, countless times a day since the baby, and now the phone's not ringing. It always pissed me off and now that I don't have it..."

His words hung as they both heard the start of a cry from upstairs and she knew it saved him from expanding on something he just didn't want to think about. He was up quickly and gave her a soft smile to let her know it was his turn to try to quiet her. Riza listened to his steps as he went upstairs and the baby started to wail, then she patted the couch and Hayate came up to snuggle with her. She hugged him and cried into his fur, for the friend lost, the uncertain and frightening future and the change of life as she knew it.


	3. Observance

 

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 3

**Observance**

* * *

Roy could see the seething jealousy in Havoc's face as more women swarmed around him and Elicia. It was unimaginable, that his popularity could increase, but here he was with a baby finding out that anything was possible. Elicia cooed and was quiet and content, the attention was something she was used to from her proud father parading her around. The attention was something  _he_ was used to from proudly strutting around, but this was above and beyond the norm.

"Ah, so I see what the disruption is now."

Said a voice from behind him that put an immediate end to the laughter and gushing. The crowds began to disperse and Roy turned to see the Fuhrer standing there grinning at him. He had nothing to apologize for, he had the entire week off to figure out his new life, but he still stood up straight and opened his mouth to say something when a hand waved him silent.

"I've only seen pictures, she's so much more adorable in person." Fuhrer King Bradley put his finger out to Elicia and she clutched onto it. "My condolences young lady, your father was a good man."

Roy cleared his throat. Somehow he had made it four days without thinking about Hughes being permanently gone. That  _somehow_  was more like obsessive working, from moving in to moving Elicia's bedroom into her parents room, interviewing babysitters, filing paperwork, staying up tending to a sleepless baby and finding no time for himself. It was actually a blessing in disguise. "Sir, I didn't mean to cause a scene..."

"I don't believe that for one minute, Colonel Mustang." Bradley smiled at the child and then gave Mustang and wink. "So how is parenthood treating you?"

"Still a shock sir." Roy said and realized Bradley was waiting on him to start walking with him so he handed his baby bag of diapers, bottles and parenting books to Havoc and followed the leader of their country into the courtyard at Central Command.

"I hear you and Lieutenant Hawkeye are going to be living together and raising the baby." Bradley said.

"Just roommates, sir. I assure you there is no reason to worry about fraternization." Roy replied . Yeah. Just two people, living in a dead friend's house, raising a baby without any parenting skills whatsoever. Yeah, that sounded like 'not fraternizing'.

"I give you more credit than that, Colonel. I can see the situation you are in and the role you two fine officers have accepted in order to honor the wishes of your comrades. I commend you."

Roy was surprised by that.

"It's quite a commitment though." Bradley said and looked at the young Colonel who really had no idea what he was getting into. "I found it difficult to be there as much as I wanted to be when we adopted Selim."

"I...didn't know he was adopted." Roy replied. He wasn't sure what he was stepping into here. A casual conversation with the leader of their country about lines that need not be crossed or yet another parent giving him unsolicited advice. The one thing he learned fast was that  _everyone_  had something to share on babies from their own experience which made them some sort of expert. He leaned on Havoc more than he should, his own Mom was little help since she got him when he was five.

"Yes, Mrs. Bradley and I were unable to have children of our own. I didn't want to publicize that, for obvious reasons, and my wife was worried that it would also negatively affect our son if the country always saw him as our adopted boy."

"Ah." And things got more awkward.

"So my wife wanted to extend an invitation to talk with her if you needed to." Bradley said with a smile. "Especially if you are nervous about Child Services."

What now?

Bradley saw the flicker of confusion before Mustang could hide it. "Child services has gotten more strict about visitations and interviews after that widely publicized mess with Shou Tucker."

Child services? Interviews? Visitations?  _What?!_

"I do _not_  want to have another individual under my command come under fire for something like that again. This country is looking on you now Colonel, your future is now directly tied to that baby if you choose to become her father."

Roy saw a glint in the Fuhrer's eye as he glanced at him. The meaning of the conversation was now evidently clear: an embarrassment of that scale from another member of the military would not be tolerated. The people of Amestris already feared the army, they needed to see the human side of the soldiers in order to feel protected by their fellow citizens instead of kept in line by heartless men in uniform. Hughes was killed by a serial killer, a man who had killed 30 people already, and the military appeared helpless to stop it. Barry the Chopper was finally caught and awaiting trail, but it was hard to feel safe. They related to the little girl left behind by the horrors of this world, they wanted to see what their country would do to put an end to all this evil. So the spotlight was on him, a household name from the war and a constant mention in society columns. His rise to the top hinged on his ability to become a hero again. "Understood, sir."

Bradley grinned. "Excellent. Mrs. Bradley wanted me to let you know she is also available for babysitting now that Selim is in school. She's missing her little boy quite a bit. Perhaps it's a situation that could be mutually beneficial?"

"Thank you sir." Roy replied and Elicia made a squeak. He looked down at her and realized that a much heavier weight was on his shoulders than he anticipated. Then Bradley was off, taking long strides out of the courtyard to his next destination. He looked back at Havoc who looked like he really needed a smoke even though he wasn't part of the conversation. He didn't even smoke but felt like he could start. What the hell just happened?

* * *

Riza finished reorganizing the kitchen cabinets and finally turned to Rebecca who was tapping her fingers on the table. "What?"

"You guys are really going to have a baby together without having sex first?"

Riza slammed a cup down on the counter and poured herself a cup of coffee. "Look, if I had interest in dating that man I would have done so on the many many  _many_  occasions that Maes tried to set us up. I am not interested. This is not a situation that has anything to do with me or Roy, it is about Elicia. I want a professional working relationship, that will be the best thing for her."

"Right." Rebecca said and leaned back in her chair. "How about the fact that you don't know anything about kids and neither does he?"

"We learn. My grandfather has been amazing and Roy's friend Jean is some kind of domestic God." Riza said and looked down at Elicia sleeping on a play mat in the corner with Hayate beside her.

"I love you Riza, but you really like discipline and organization...and babies are nothing but chaos. So are boys that live in your house." Rebecca said and didn't want to point out that Riza had just went through all the cabinets and put things back where they 'belonged' after Mustang had put dishes away. "We were roommates, remember?"

"And I didn't kill you, did I?" Riza said and sat down at the table. She was more than capable of living in an inconvenient or uncomfortable situation. Eighteen years with Roy couldn't be as bad as eighteen years with her father.

Point. Missed. Entirely. "So how has the first few days been? Getting sleep?"

"Actually it's working out well. Mustang seems to have issues sleeping and likes having something to do at night." Riza wrapped her hands around her coffee. She had pills for that. The reason she and Gracia became friends was that she had gone to a clinic for some sleep aides after a bad week of nightmares. Gracia was a sweet nurse, didn't judge her, she managed to put her at ease and broach the subject of her PTSD with the grace and finesse of a dancer. Her name fit her perfectly. It was the first person she really opened up to about her problems from the war. Gracia had been the one to find Hayate, told her that a puppy would be great therapy and company. She looked over at Hayate and smiled. He was a blessing. She took a swallow of coffee when she realized she should have those feelings about the baby not the dog beside her if she was going to be a Mom.

Rebecca nodded. "Until he goes back to work."

Riza shrugged. "We'll figure it out, like rational adults."

"Speaking of work...how are you guys going to figure out a baby and your jobs?"

"Roy interviewed people." Riza reached over and grabbed a list of names, all scratched out. "It was more like an interrogation, actually. We still have a few more days to find someone."

Rebecca drank her coffee and raised her eyebrows. Then the front door opened and Hayate stood up to start barking. The baby woke up and immediately started screaming. She cringed, kids were just not her thing.

"Shit!" Roy said as he realized what had just happened and walked into the kitchen to see Riza bending down to pick up Elicia. He may have been too obvious about looking at her ass as the friend at the table gave him a knowing smirk.

"Sorry." Roy said and Hayate came trotting over to get scratched and a treat.

" _Stop_ spoiling  _my_  dog." Riza said and watched a chunk of something disappear out of Roy's hand and into Hayate's mouth. Elicia started screaming louder and Riza felt immediately overwhelmed.

"I'm out. See you at work." Rebecca said and grabbed her purse and gave Mustang a once over before she darted out of the room. If Riza maintained her 'just roommates' and 'professional parents' bullshit while living in a house with a man that looked like that, she was a bona fide saint.

Riza sighed. Elicia has been almost impossible to get to bed after she had been out with Mustang all day being worn out and driven around. Now she was far from tired and, of course, it was her turn to tend to the baby. "Don't reward him for barking at you."

"He's guarding the house." Roy said and Hayate looked up at him and wagged his tail.

"He's learning that you'll give him treats for everything. He never used to bark before." Riza said and Elicia kept crying. She walked around the room and looked for a pacifier. She couldn't find one when she got home and wondered where they all went to. Then Roy pulled one out of his pocket and gave her an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, I forget it was in there." He said and washed it off before giving it to the baby. She took it and started sucking. They both relaxed a little.

"Any luck finding a sitter?" She asked.

"No..." He replied. "However I found out that we need to meet with child services. Apparently Maes and Gracia left us their kid but they don't get to be the judge of who is actually fit to take care of her."

"What?" Riza asked and rocked Elicia a little. "Says who?"

"The Fuhrer." Roy said and Riza look mortified. "He caught me at work when I went in to get some paperwork done and we had a little chat. I looked into it and apparently even though we have been named guardians in their will, it's still considered a legal matter and must be finalized in court."

"We signed paperwork. " She reminded him. "We signed the applications to be her legal guardians."

"Applications." He said. "Apparently that's not a guarantee. We must be found suitable parents, there are visitation and interviews...it's far from a done deal."

"They...can take her away from us? Even when it's what her parents wanted?" Riza looked down at the baby. She was struggling with this but she'd make it happen,  _they_  would make it happen. "Who do we need to talk with?"

"I have a meeting set up with a couple who adopted. Child Services said they wanted to have her talk with us about expectations before even bothering to discuss our case." Roy said and pulled out a piece of paper.

"I have to work." Riza reminded him. "I can't just take more time off for this."

"I know, I set it up for this weekend, in Dublith." Roy looked at the names again. "Sig and Izumi Curtis. They have a butcher shop. Adopted two kids."

Riza nodded. "If that's what we need to do."

"I don't understand this, if we were good enough for her parents why..." Roy suddenly felt the pressure piling on. He could fail Maes before he even got the chance to try. "You know the damned government controls way too much. They shouldn't be able to interfere with something like this."

" _You_  work for the government. As do I." She reminded him. Sometimes she did see what Maes saw in him, the way he took charge and the disgust he vocalized at how things were handled. There was competence there, confidence. She hoped it wasn't just an act. "It's to safeguard the baby. We have nothing to worry about, right?"

"I can bullshit my way through anything. Especially government evaluations." He assured her. "Nothing to worry about."

Riza nodded. She also had skirted through evaluations even though the way he said that was not very assuring. "We need to find a babysitter. They are going to want to see we have plans in place."

"About that..." Roy said with a smile. She looked worried. "I'm going to have tea with Mrs. Bradley tomorrow."

"What?" How did he get a date with the Fuhrer's wife!?

"About babysitting Elicia." He said with a shrug. "I'm out of options."

" _How_  is she an option?" She asked. How did he even manage to get to to her!?

"Apparently she offered." Roy explained. "Our situation here has been getting a lot of attention. The military might be using us to reassure the public."

"Wonderful." Riza realized Elicia was back to sleep and went to put her down on her mat. Hayate trotted over and curled up next to her. She was actually thankful Roy was so well connected, but the consequences of his popularity had yet to be revealed until now. The whole damned country was watching them.


	4. Judgement

 

 

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 4

**Judgement**

* * *

The train ride to Dublith was the first time since the funeral that they had to sit and do nothing. Elicia slept in her carrier, rocked to sleep by the train, and they sat looking out the window trying to think of anything that wasn't about their dead friends. Finally Roy spoke, after he realized he forgot to get a camera and take pictures because that was what Hughes would have done. That thought alone made his throat tighten. "Mrs. Bradley is very excited to start babysitting."

"I can't believe you pulled that off." Riza said and recalled the many times Maes had tried to tell her how Mustang could pull strings and make things happen. How he always came through for him. That there was more to his reputation than there appeared to be. She hoped that his connections would make life a little easier for Elicia.

"I really can't take much credit for that." Roy said and leaned back in the seat to take a good look at her. Maes had tried time and time again to set them up. He could never be truly honest with his best friend about his reasons for shying away from any kind of committed relationship, and it was just easier to say she wasn't his type. However she made a simple brown skirt suit look amazing and the reality was that he was looking at living with this woman for the next eighteen years, that was pretty committed. A relationship was still out of the question, he was a disaster waiting to happen and casualty would be Elicia. "She volunteered and was actually begging for the job. I am glad you agreed to let her do it, I would hate to see what happens when I make Mrs. Bradley cry."

Riza smiled. It was kind of him to include her in the decision but it was evident the decision was already made. "I'm sure it will help the Fuhrer keep tabs on us as well."

Roy appreciated her ability to see a situation for what it was, and it was obvious this situation benefitted everyone involved but it was a double edged sword; A sword of judgement hanging over their heads. He didn't have to try to hard to imagine Bradley coming home from work and his wife filling him in on what time Elicia was dropped off and picked up, the number of diapers and how much dog hair was on the blankets, how well they had answered the parenting questions and followed through on her advice...

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that to come across as negatively as it did." Riza said, kicking herself for immediately commenting on the motives behind this offer. She was sure Roy knew what the fine print was, even if this was only a hand shake deal. He was a Colonel afterall, navigating politics was part of his life at that rank. He did a good thing, he deserved positive reinforcement.

Roy gave her a forgiving smile, "I didn't see it that way. I appreciate your candor."

Silence fell over them once again and Riza kept crossing and uncrossing her legs trying to get comfortable. She was nervous about this meeting with child services. She wished she could get to know Roy better before they were put on the spot and scrutinized about their ability to accept this new role. One thing they had both learned rather quickly is that everyone wanted to give them advice and insist they knew the only way to raise a child. It was already old.

Roy tried to read the paper but the Barry the Chopper case was all anyone was talking about. He could pick Maes's name out of the article without even reading it and thought better of reading up on how things were progressing with the Hughes's killer. He threw the paper on the seat and just resigned to silence.

* * *

"You need to actually hold her, she's not a bomb." Izumi Curtis took the little girl into her arms and felt a warmth rush over her. She smiled at the baby and Elicia squeaked at her in response.

"You should see the devastation that comes out the bottom side of her before you make that call." Roy replied and watched the giant Sig Curtis loom over his wife and suddenly melt into a a huge teddy bear of ooh and ahhs. Elicia squealed in delight. This was what the kid deserved and had up until a week ago. He had foolishly convinced himself they were doing a good job, but in two minutes Izumi saw the truth. They were scared and they handled her like they were going to break her.

"So is she not having regular bowel movements?" Izumi asked, concerned that the stress of this situation was causing health problems for the girl. She saw them both hesitate, not knowing what 'regular' should be.

"I figured there would be some issues as we changed her from breast milk to formula." Riza tried to sound like she was knowledgeable, but all her information came from raising a puppy. "I mixed them so we could avoid digestive upset as we transitioned to a new food."

Izumi nodded. The new parents were in need of positive reinforcement more than anything. They were tense, awkward and scared. "Good. That's a great call."

Riza smiled and Izumi handed her the baby. She took her and allowed the woman to readjust her arms so Elicia was closer to her chest. She felt so out of place, she felt like everyone could see how unnatural this was for her. She felt like everyone was judging her because she was a woman and should know what to do.

"Snuggle her, hold her like she's the most precious thing in this world and you will never let go. Babies need that, they need to feel your love." Izumi said and turned to the new father. "You too. You hold her like she's going to shatter. Stop being so nervous. She can feel your anxiety. That makes her uncomfortable."

"Ah, like a dog." Roy said and immediately regretted not filtering it. It was truth though, he picked up Hayate and carried him around more than Elicia.

"Exactly. Like a living breathing mammal who is part of your family. A baby that you need to care for and nourish. Stop acting like you'll break her." Izumi sat down and Sig went over to make some faces at the baby and make her chirp.

"Play with her and read to her. Sing to her." Sig said. "Be a kid again. She's your daughter, not a mission you need to complete. Leave work at the door and be a Mom and Dad for her, not a Colonel and Lieutenant."

Riza looked over at Roy and realized this was probably all good advice they needed to hear. They were both guilty of just trying to do what had to be done to care for her without really breaking down and being personal. They had just introduced themselves by military rank. Thank God this wasn't the actual interview, certainly the child service people would have deemed them unfit by now.

"So you two don't really know each other that well?" Izumi asked.

Roy snapped back to attention as two boys came running through the yard and tackled each other. Sig and Izumi didn't even flinch. They didn't look over at the two rolled around and fought. "No."

"She's going to pick up on tension between you. So try to work your problems out away from her." Izumi said and listened as Ed and Al wrestled and then took off sprinting towards the tree house.

"We're not fighting over anything." Riza said.

"You will." Sig assured her. "Things amplify as a baby comes into the picture."

Roy looked over as the shorter boy reached the tree house and they locked eyes for a minute, then the kid gave him the middle finger and disappeared into the wooden enclosure. He looked to the parents and they just kept their eyes on them, the adults. Was this another evaluation? How they would react to seeing kids be...well kids? "What can we expect from child services?"

"Unexpected visits. Questions you don't want to answer or have answers to." Sig said. "Don't sweat it, they aren't trying to steal your kid. They want to make sure you are taking care of her. That's all."

"I think we're both painfully aware of how unprepared we are for this." Riza said and looked at Elicia who was used to having parents who gush over her like the Curtis's were doing.. She didn't know if she could ever be like that, she still was just taking care of a friend's baby.

"It's incredible you are trying." Izumi said and then stood up and hollered. "Boys! Clean up for lunch!"

Roy raised an eyebrow. Oh, if barking orders was all he needed to do to keep a kid in line he was going to be father of the year! Unfortunately he knew that was not the case and he was going to be looking at a lot of problems in the near future as he tried to co-exist with a stranger. He lived alone for a reason and he wasn't keen on explaining himself to anyone either.

Izumi looked back at them as they tried to not look crushed by the weight of the world. "You'll be fine, you've already passed the first test."

"What's that?" Riza asked.

"I'll pass on my recommendation and evaluation to child services." Izumi said. "I don't like home visits, I like seeing you out of your element. Losing a weekend day, traveling hours to meet with a stranger, traveling with a baby on a train...you've done just fine. You're committed to trying to make this work. I'll give you my number if you have any questions but try to come up with solutions together. You have to communicate and trust each other, parenting is a partnership not a competition. You're welcome to stay for lunch, but it's not necessary. I'm sure you have plenty to do at home."

"I think we'd both like to head home and keep trying to settle in." Roy offered and Riza nodded as well. They both wanted to get the hell out of here and breathe a sigh of relief that they were able to leave with Elicia. These two were doing the evaluation for child services? How the hell didn't he see that coming? Like teh government was going to give him a free tutor before the test, he was a fucking idiot.

"Good luck you two." Izumi said. "Don't be too hard on yourselves. The real truth about parenting is nobody knows what they're doing."

"I think if you met the Hughes's, you'd find that hard to believe." Riza said and Izumi smiled at her.

"They had their moments, trust me." She said and gave them both a warm smile. "You're scared, intimidated...you're learning. That's better than those people who think they know it all any day, you'll do fine."

They watched her get up and leave, tenderly ruffle up the hair of the boys who came running over to her to clean up for dinner. Then Roy said softly, "I think if she met the Hughes's she would find that hard to believe."

* * *

Riza was tired from the stress of the day and was happy they got home early enough that she could walk Hayate in daylight and take a break from home. When she got back she let him off the leash and he waited on her to see what she wanted, knowing that if he ran off to check Mustang's pockets he'd get scolded by her. At least one of them was trainable. She looked upstairs as she heard what sounded like soft singing and crept up to the bedroom where she found out that Maes wasn't lying about all those karaoke championships. Roy Mustang did indeed sing  _really_  damned well.

" _Wowow, My...Train in rain_ " Roy rocked away in the rocking chair and held the little girl close to his chest as instructed by Mrs. Curtis. Elicia seemed to be happier with this and he realized he had been of little comfort to her since her parents died. If she picked up on everything like a dog would, he was sure she was scared and miserable. That was the last thing Hughes would want. " _Smiling vision, Time goes by...will you forgive me?_  "

Riza watched Hayate go over to his new favorite person and get his long overdue scratches. Roy tilted his head and looked at her, he looked tired and she realized he was unguarded and relaxed now. He was breathtaking and it bothered her that she even thought that. Developing feeling for each other was unacceptable and it would never work out anyway. This was just a spark of lust for someone who was hard to not notice. Especially in a half unbuttoned shirt. She went over and sat down on the bed and smiled at him as Elicia wiggled in his arms. "You learned your lesson well."

"I didn't realize that she could pick up on things like a dog. I think hearing that made me realize I was treating the dog better."

Riza nodded. "Me too."

"It's kind of amazing to think that someone this young can feel that. I guess it's really fascinating to see how instincts and self preservation work." Roy let her clutch his finger, the only thing he had ever done before he was saddled with raising Maes's baby, was let her touch his finger. He refused to hold her even though Maes would have been pushed to tears if he saw his best friend marvel over the miracle of life like he was doing now. "You can't stand up or stop crapping on yourself but you can understand that, huh?"

"I was thinking, that maybe we should start doing things as a family." Riza said. "You and I need to get to know each other and she needs to be with us as much as possible. I don't want to intrude on your free time but...for right now I think we could try to be less awkward around each other. She needs to get back to normal."

"That sounds great." He said and tried to tug his finger back but Elicia's grip tightened. "What do you have in mind?"

"My grandfather wants to have us over for poker night." Riza suggested. It was the only idea she had. "He wants to see the baby again and he wanted to meet you."

"Sounds fun." Roy lied. Poker with old people, especially old Generals, was like going back to the academy and listening to guest lectures on tactics, history and the good old days. Grumman was, however, a great babysitter and very liberal with his expensive booze.

"Liar." She said and he gave her the most adorable smile. "You should get cleaned up, starts at 1900 hours."


	5. Expectations

 

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 5

**Expectations**

* * *

"So.." General Grumman said as he eyes his playing cards and casually glanced over the top of them to look at Mustang, "Are you going to marry my granddaughter?"

Roy wasn't sure if Grumman was genuinely asking him questions or using his questions to distract him. He adjusted the cards in his hand and looked over at the old general's smiling face. "I don't know her that well, but I don't think she'd appreciate you trying to arrange a marriage for her."

"Is that a 'Yes'?" Grumman asked and discarded two cards.

"I can't imagine how this arrangement will work otherwise, Mustang." General Raven said and put a card down. "The whole damned country is watching you and bets are being made as to how long it will take for you to fold: Either quit or marry."

"We're going to try to keep things professional, General." Roy said. Of course the brass were betting on him, the jaded old fucks.

"In my day, courting a woman was different." Grumman said. "Not nearly as much dating as your generation, it was a serious affair. Unwed and living with a woman...well I hate the implications and rumors that accompany that."

"Back in your day," General Hakuro said. "They thought fire was the epitome of technological advancement."

Roy smirked and threw a card on the table. So this was about his reputation. It was also about these men trying to get an inside edge on the betting pool. He looked around at the Generals, Grumman, Raven and Hakuro, and wondered how many were betting against him and which ones just wanted him to fail. "We are two soldiers honoring the wishes of a fallen comrade."

"A family is more than that, Mustang." Hakuro said and reached out for a cigar and lit it. "You'll see. Kids aren't easy. Especially babies."

"The way I see it, it's a gift." Raven said and picked up the deck to deal out new cards. "You're an ambitious man, Mustang. Colonel, in your 20's? That's unheard of."

"Unless there's a war." Hakuro chimed in. He was still a little bitter about how quickly Mustang rose through the ranks. More like _skipped_  ranks.

"All I'm saying is that maybe people might take you a little more seriously if you settle down." Raven said and set his cards down to grab a cigar and light it. "You're young so the bachelor thing worked in your favor. I thought you were holding out for some political marriage, get yourself aligned with one of the old Amestrian families and marry into money and prestige. I guess in this day and age the public opinion is more important, and the papers just love the idea of the Hero of Ishval swooping in and saving babies. They're hungry for romance though. They're already imagining you in your dress uniform at the alter waiting on Hawkeye, the woman who tamed the wild Mustang and made him husband material."

Roy took his new cards. His hand was total shit. Still, he'd see if he could bluff. He needed to show he was willing to play the damned game to it's fullest in front of these bastards. "Now you sound like Hughes."

"He was a good man." Grumman said and pulled the liquor cart closer to use the opportunity to open a new bottle of bourbon. He put equal amounts in four shot glasses and then passed them around the table. "A toast, to Lieutenant Colonel Hughes. May he rest in peace."

Roy went through the motions and clinked the shot glass against his fellow officer's. Then downed it. He was in for a long night.

Raven looked into his shot glass and mumbled. "Wife and kids don't stop you from... _exploring options_. You just have to be discrete. I know you Mustangs understand the meaning of that."

Roy put on a fake smile, it was typical talk for these higher ups and he knew he'd be walking into this talk Monday when he went back to work. He could count on chatter about how he had just been set up to have the picture perfect family, complete with decorated house and provided 'wife and kid'.  _Hughes always did look out for him._  He would have to see how he could play all the angles here, especially while the Fuhrer was keeping a close eye on him from the work and home front. Cultivating the rumors and managing the generals was all in a days work if he expected to climb the ladder any further. He'd just have to repress the anger, drown the grief and soldier on.

* * *

"He's gorgeous." Lyra said as she placed the appetizers on the tray and smiled at Riza. Her boss had warned her that his granddaughter wasn't interested in talking about her escort for the evening, but she would not be deterred. She was dying to know what was going on and so was Grumman. "The Colonel that is. The papers don't do him justice."

Riza could see the sparkle in the maid's eye and knew that was the same view everyone had of this situation: Roy Mustang was Amestris's most eligible bachelor. A handsome war hero, one of the youngest Colonels ever commissioned and with a future as bright as the sun. She had already heard the gossip at work as she passed by, then again when Rebecca repeated it to her, Riza Hawkeye was one  _lucky_  woman. To be left a house, a baby she didn't have to ruin her figure to make and the most desirable man in the country? It was a fairy tale. "Lyra, I'm not bringing him here as my date."

"Of course not, but certainly with you living together things might...develop?" Lyra asked.

"No." Riza said. "We are raising a child together. We will share the responsibilities and work out a schedule to keep our lives as separate as we can while still having time together with her like a family. Unorthodox but practical. For the baby."

"Who takes care of the baby during the day?" Lyra asked.

"Mrs. Bradley will be babysitting."

"Wouldn't it be easier if you stayed home?"

"I'm not giving up my job to be a housewife." Riza said with a little too much hostility and Lyra just smiled. It's not that Riza wasn't used to the general attitude towards women in the military, it was the betrayal of people who had said they understood and respected her career choice that was upsetting her. It wasn't just a job for her, not anymore. Sure she was just a 2nd Lieutenant and not a Colonel, but that didn't mean she had any less value or not do her job well. She was a rank higher than she should have been do to her success during the war, it's just that her work was done with less fanfare than that of a certain Colonel. She worked alone, it made it hard to get noticed and that wasn't the point of it all. She just wanted to get her job done, not play politics. "I worked hard for the respect and rank I have."

"I..know." Lyra said and continued to place appetizers on the tray. She had served the Grumman family for years and had been in the house when Riza decided to go to the military academy. Lyra herself was subject to the military men, like General Raven, and understood it wasn't an easy road for Riza at all. Every day she had to fight for respect and had to carefully maintain her character off duty and on to make sure she wouldn't lose ground on that. The Generals, and clearly the Colonel as well, did not. "I'll go bring these appetizers to the study."

"Ok." Riza sighed. She really wished she could call Gracia right now. Even though Gracia loved being a Mom, she understood better than any of her friends that it might not be endgame for everyone. She always marveled at that, how the one person who should have been pushing her own agenda ended up being an ally.

"Do you want me to see if the Colonel needs reinforcements?"

"After Elicia has her dinner, I'll be in to play a few hands. It's my turn to feed her." Riza sad and Lyra nodded and disappeared with her tray of food. Roy could take care of herself, she wasn't here to save him and she needed a little time alone to prepare for what was in store for her in that room. She knew she could expect more of this come Monday, more people asking her why she wasn't making the most of this amazing opportunity dropped in her lap. Why would she possibly want her career when she could have Roy Mustang  _and_  the Hughes's life instead? She doubted anyone was asking him why he wasn't giving up his job, she doubted anyone was looking at him with disappointment every time he admitted he didn't know anything about kids. She put her face in her hands and closed her eyes, she doubted he was struggling with this as much as she was. He seemed to have everything under control, from babysitters to reorganizing the house, and she was praying she could go to sleep every night and wake up to find out this was just a dream. That morning would come and Gracia would be there telling her that these feelings of outrage were absolutely acceptable, that she envied her for being strong enough to be a soldier and continue to work on what she believed in.

* * *

"Did you forget the way home?" Riza asked as she realized they were going the wrong way to get back to the house. She knew she should have insisted he let her drive.

"No." Roy said and tried to keep his focus on the road. He had been trying to be a better driver now that Elicia rode in the car with him. Hughes had always been a major critic of his driving and he knew now was the time to take those criticisms to heart. "I thought you might like to meet my Mom. "

"Oh." Riza wasn't expecting that. "She lives in Central?"

"Yes." Roy said and pulled down a side street and parked. "This is where I grew up."

Riza wasn't sure why he parked and was getting out of the car. She looked around and realized they had parked in front of an establishment with a sign over the door that said  _Christmas's Bar._ She recognized the name, she had heard officers talking about it being a great place to get drinks and  _other services._ She couldn't believe Roy was stopping here with her and the baby! Was he unable to manage his damned urges for another few hours?

Roy opened the back door and reached out for Elicia to get her out of the car seat. He wasn't sure why Riza was taking so long to get out. "Do...you not want to meet my Mom? I just thought since you took me to poker night we were trying to include our families in this endeavor."

"This is a bar." Riza said and he looked at her like it a stupid observation. "You want to bring a baby into a bar?"

"It's my Mom's place. I know you didn't want to expose her to the cigar smoke at your grandfather's, I wasn't going in the front entrance. I thought we could go through the kitchen?" Roy picked up Elicia and waited on Riza to confirm it was OK.

"Your Mom is  _Madam Christmas_?" Riza said and watched him nod.

"I thought you knew." Roy said. "Your grandfather made it well known that he had been employing her services for years. I assumed he would have shared that with you and not just used it to try to ruin my poker game."

"Oh my god." Riza gasped. "No...he never shared that with me."

"Well he  _over_  shared that with me." Roy mumbled.

Riza finally got out of the car to help him and shook her head. She should have known her grandfather had some tricks up his sleeve. What game was he playing? Was he really trying to push her into Mustang's arms? "I'm sorry. He does that. Always tries to get an edge somehow."

"I let him win a few hands, just not the ones where he told me dirty little secrets about my Mom." Roy said and rolled his eyes. "Thankfully he waited until Raven and Hakuro left to try that move. Last thing I want to hear from those two at work is anything like that."

Riza wasn't surprised that her grandfather knew of Mustang when she told him about the shared custody arrangement or her moving in with a Colonel in order to facilitate that deal. She was surprised he held back information though and she wondered if Lyra's conversation this evening was encouraged by him at all. The crafty old bastard was always up to something and she wondered what he really thought of this situation. "You grew up here?"

Roy held the baby, Hayate jumped to the sidewalk and Riza closed the car door for him. "Yeah. It's not the Amestrian dream home but it worked."

"I didn't mean to sound like I disapproved, I'm just surprised." She said and Hayate waited for his leash to be clipped on his collar. "I guess I just imagined you came from a influential family...you seem so comfortable in the spotlight. You have skills, you know how to sing and I'm told you can play piano and dance. Speak foreign languages. That all usually points to a fairly well off family."

"Madam Christmas used to be a vaudeville star. Cigarettes took her singing voice, but she still coached the girls who wanted to move on to something better. We had a piano player in the bar, girls danced. I just absorbed it all, she didn't exactly pay for lessons, it was part of her life and she made sure to enrich others with her experiences." Roy walked along the sidewalk to the back entrance. It was a chance to get to know each other so he asked, "I assumed you had a lot of hunting or shooting growing up?"

"Hunting." She said. "I grew up on a farm. I learned to shot to put food on the table. Ammo costs money and you just didn't waste ammo."

"It's funny what helps build our lives, isn't it?" Roy said and opened the back door to hold it for Riza. "The good and bad?"

Now it was them responsible for what molded Elicia, god help them both. Riza nodded and went inside the building where she was greeted with the sound of a lively kitchen. She walked in and as soon as Roy followed her the cook lit up and stopped what she was doing.

"Roy! Holy shit, I didn't believe it when they told me! You really did adopt a baby!"

"Technically I am her legal guardian." Roy said as Lillian came over to look at the baby. Then she looked over at Riza. "And this is my co-guardian, Riza Hawkeye. Riza, this is Lillian, she is the chef here."

"You two are living together now?" Lillian said with a nod. "Well good for you."

"It's not like that." Roy said and the door to the bar swung open and his Mom came back to see who was in the back talking. He watched her eyes scan him, the baby, Riza and then drop to Hayate. "Hi Mom."

"Why do you have a dog in my kitchen?" Madam asked and looked at him with her hand on her hip. "Why are you damned near 30 and I am  _still_  asking you that question?"

"I didn't want to walk in the bar with the baby, Madam." Roy said and nodded to Elicia. "I thought you might want to meet everyone."

"So how is this going to work?" Christmas came over and looked at him and the baby he was carrying like she was going to break apart like an eggshell.  _God dammit Roy, you and your need to find and protect strays._ She knew this was going to put a strain on her already struggling son, there was nothing about this that seemed like a good idea. Hughes wanted to push the family ticket, always, but she knew Roy could crumble if he had just one more person relying on him to always be strong and have the answers.

Riza had to say, Madam Christmas was direct.

Roy held out his hand and said, "Madam, this is Riza Hawkeye. We're going to raise Elicia together."

"You make a nice couple." Chris waved her cigarette at the baby and at Riza. She knew her boy too damned well, he wasn't going to be able to keep things professional. Especially not when this was his new life, and they were his family.  _God dammit Hughes_.

"We already talked about this." Roy said and she gave him that glare that said 'Well apparently you didn't listen to a word I said'. "We're just going to keep things professional."

"Well you want to hear what the latest gossip is about you two?" Chris placed her cigarette to her lips and looked Riza over.

"Might as well." Roy said and waved some of the smoke away from Elicia's face. "I hear I might want to place some bets."

"Well there are some customers that feel there must have been something already going on between you two if Hughes would leave you his precious angel baby." Chris watched them react to that, determining for herself if that was true or not. Apparently not. Weird, Roy liked blonds. He also liked commanding women and this Riza wasn't giving an inch of ground here. Interesting. "Then there are others who are saying Hawkeye is going to tame the Mustang and ride him right out of the military and into domestic bless."

Riza groaned. This was hard enough without _everyone_ watching them _._

"Sorry kid, that's the reality of it. Some people can't fathom that a woman might want a life outside what's considered normal and acceptable roles." Chris said to Riza and watched the girl's eyes light up. "I've been there, everyone telling me that my lifestyle wasn't good enough to raise a child, that my life had to be set aside to concentrate on kid like he needed. Roy-Boy turned out alright and I raised him to have more respect for women than that. This damned world likes to shine a light on everything a woman isn't instead of what she's accomplished. Especially these insecure military assholes who can't handle that hit to their fragile self-worth. They want you both to fail, just so they feel better about themselves."

Riza wasn't expecting someone to understand what she was going through and certainly wasn't expecting encouraging words. She felt like this whole world was looking down on her right now because she didn't know about babies and wasn't quitting her job. She gave Madam a smile, a simple thank you for being understanding when she was starting to feel alone again. Not that she wasn't used to being alone and just getting the job done, but it was so much harder knowing an innocent life was riding on her actions. "Thank you."

"Well I have a bar to run." Chris said as she saw the wheels turn in Roy's head, the realization that he wasn't seeing the complete picture here. That Riza was enduring this all from a different perspective. "Get your baby to bed, thanks for stopping by. Come for lunch sometime. Both of you."

Roy gave her a kiss goodbye and then they went back outside into the cool clean air and walked back to the car in silence. Riza opened the door for Elicia and put her in her baby seat and covered her in a blanket. Then she closed the door and Roy opened hers for her. "I'm sorry that I didn't realize this road has been more difficult for you, that everyone is expecting you to take advantage of this situation to... change occupations."

"Roy, I'm used to it."

"It doesn't mean it's right." Roy said. "I saw all the copies of your commendations and awards on your grandfather's wall. You hold academy records and commendations from the war, I knew you excelled in your field but I didn't comprehend to what extent until tonight. I know that road hasn't been easy for you."

"Do you?" She asked honestly. "Do you really understand how I have to prove myself everyday or lose ground?"

"No. I can't imagine what it's like, but I can acknowledge it's a different path than mine has been." He said and hung on the door. "I had to listen to a lot tonight from the Generals and I wanted to tell you that it isn't how I feel about our situation. I don't expect you to be the one who makes the sacrifices instead of me, I don't feel that way."

"Is that why you brought me here?" She asked and looked up at the bar sign. "So you could let your Mom tell me you're not the kind of guy that you appear to be?"

"Same reason you brought me to poker night, to show me what you have to endure." He said and gave her an appreciative smile. "We don't really know each other, and honestly we don't have reason to believe anything the other says unless we have grounds to put stock in that."

"Maybe. Maybe I was tired of answering the same questions and I just thought you could use the interactions with some of the top Brass. I also wanted you to take their money." She said and watched some men coming down the sidewalk and wanted to wrap this up now that privacy was about to be compromised. She got in the car and watched a smile form on Roy's face, a genuine smile of appreciation before he closed the door. She really hoped that Roy was the man Maes thought he was, the man who was going to make a better world for his daughter.


	6. Denial

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I really don't know anything about kids, I do know about horses so any treatment or issues Elicia gets is as a little mustang. This chapter got longer than I intended, which means this fic was long than I intended and ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. Thank you for the reviews and encouragement, you keep me going.

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

_Catalyst_

Chapter 6

**Denial**

* * *

The first day with Roy back to work went as expected. Riza heard every possible version of how she _lucked_  into the perfect life and how  _lucky_  she was to be the one who could have the insider's edge to making Roy Mustang settle down. The only person who said how lucky Roy was to have  _her_  was his bodyguard Jean Havoc. That wasn't what was currently bothering her as she made her way to the cafeteria for lunch. It was the fact that all the focus was now on her home life, instead of on the loss of two great people. The world moved on, barely pausing to acknowledge that Maes Hughes no longer walked this halls.

She walked into the cafeteria and made her way through the line then chose to sit down by herself and pull out a book. She was only alone for about two minutes before Roy arrived and made his way to the table and sat down with an exhausted sigh. She felt like she understood what it was about without asking, that single exhale seemed to have so much weight to it.

"I swear to God if one more person tells me how fucking lucky Elicia is to have me, I'm going to set someone on fire." Roy huffed and he angrily buttered his dinner roll and kept his focus on not snapping the knife. "It's as if the whole damned military has completely forgotten Maes Hughes was murdered. Forgotten he was the best damned father anyone could ask for. Forgotten..."

Riza watched the plastic knife snap and wondered if he had already forgotten the conversation they had Saturday night.

He looked up at her and saw an exhausted look and he studied her face for something to tell him what he had done wrong. He finished putting the butter on his roll with the broken knife handle and said, "I'm guessing from the look you're giving me that you've been experiencing things from a different angle."

"I'm apparently really lucky to have  _you_  as well." Riza said simply and he paused as he was about to bite into his dinner roll to give her an apologetic look. One that said he was sorry even though he had nothing to do with the issue. "Good news for you, I suppose, since you're looking to move up the chain of command. Everyone sees you as a knight in shining armor."

"I thought you were supposed to be the knight  _riding_  me." Roy smirked. Moments like this he missed Hughes because he would have been the one making those stupid jokes. It still didn't sink in that he was gone, part of him embraced the denial that Hughes was just off on some assignment somewhere and just wasn't  _here_ in Central _._

"I pretty sure the damsel who needs to be saved from her own atypical female profession can't be the knight." She replied and then closed her eyes. Of all the things to bother her, she never thought this would be it. She felt bad that she resented this situation because it was putting a spotlight on her like this. "Sorry, I didn't mean for that to come out so bitchy."

Roy shrugged. "It's OK. It's something I think we need to talk about. It does concern all of us."

"Things have amplified since you've come back to work." She said and picked at her lunch with her fork. All positives in Roy's column, none in hers that she wanted. It wasn't his fault though. "Last week it was just whispers, rumors...this week the voices are getting louder. I guess it's a confirmed arrangement now that Elicia is being babysat by Mrs. Bradley and you and I are having lunch."

Roy paused again before taking another bite. He looked around and saw the eyes on them, the smiles. Fucking General Raven even gave him a wink and raised his glass in a mock toast. Asshole. "Sorry. I should have asked if you wanted to be left alone. I just...well I actually wanted to tell you that Mrs. Bradley called but I was too pissed off to remember that."

"This is fine, Roy." She replied. "We live together now. I have to just let this all roll off my shoulders like I always have."

"We live together now." He repeated. It still didn't sink in that this was real, no matter how many times he said it. "I'm sure you're sick of me. I'm sure you're sick of people not seeing those stars on your shoulders and giving you the respect you've earned."

"I think it's important we communicate and are honest with each other." Riza said. "I keep thinking about what Izumi Curtis said, how Elicia can pick up on anything you and I are uncomfortable with and I think we need to try to keep our lives as normal as we can as we transition to this new life. Too much change at once will be too much to handle. We're only human."

"I agree." He said and paused once more before eating another bite. "So...does that mean you don't want to have lunch with me?"

She shook her head and smiled. "It's fine. I usually end up going back to work right after I eat. I can't recall the last time I took a full lunch break."

Roy chuckled. "I can't remember the last time I only took an hour for lunch break."

Riza couldn't help but wonder what Maes saw in the future that he imagined for them because she and Roy were so very different. She couldn't help but think Maes would be right there with the rest of the world, telling Roy it was about time he settled down, got a wife and kid and got someone to take care of him. She already had one baby to worry about and she hoped Roy wasn't going to need more attention than Elicia. She already wanted to scold him about his lunch break being a 'perk of high ranking officers' but knew it was just her stress showing. She didn't need to take it out on him. He was trying, just like her, and it seemed like he was handling it much better than she was. "So, how is Elicia doing?"

"I assume she's doing great as all I heard was about how cute she is, what a good baby and not to worry about anything." Roy shrugged. "The Fuhrer was grinning from ear to ear, apparently his wife is really happy which makes  _him_  happy."

Riza nodded. Roy seemed to be handling everything very well. She hoped he wasn't just using this to help himself.

"Anyhow, I know you wanted to stick to the schedule we made, so I can pick her up after work and you can have the night off." Roy said grinned at her. He knew work had been rough for her so he hoped this would help.

"You know that means I'm not leaving my dog with you while I go out, right?" Riza asked and saw his smile fade a little.

"Of course." He said and failed to cover up his disappointment. God, he really need to work on getting this kind of joy out of having a kid.

"I appreciate it. I need to finish cleaning out my apartment." She said and resisted the urge to get up and go back to work. She had to learn to be comfortable around him, especially with everyone's eyes on her.

* * *

Cleaning her apartment wasn't the chore she made it out to be, but it provided a last little bit of time in her own home that she desperately needed. Riza continued to clean as Rebecca stood around talking instead of cleaning. So much for getting help cleaning out her apartment. "Can you pass me the mop?"

"You do realize this apartment was clean while you lived in it and it's not needed to be cleaned up any more to get your security deposit back, right?"

"I'm not taking chances." Riza said and started to mop the kitchen floor. "I need that deposit back in full, everything is going to get a lot more expensive now. The Hughes's house is huge and takes a lot of electricity and gas to heat. Roy leaves lights on. He is in and out of the house with the dog constantly. He likes things too warm."

"Then tell him to stop." Rebecca replied. It wasn't like Riza to hold her tongue on things like that.

"There is a baby in the house, I can't have it 60 degrees." Riza said and sighed. Her 'spartan' lifestyle was a sharp contrast to the warmth of the Hughes home. She couldn't tell Roy to stop. The lights made things bright and cozy, the warmth was exactly what the baby needed and Hayate was enjoying having a backyard and a playmate. She would just have to adjust, these were not things that were offensive or wrong they just were not the way she did things. She conserved energy, lived simply. "It's not a bad thing, it's just expensive. I don't think he understands what living on a Lieutenant's salary in a Lieutenant Colonel's home is going to be like. Or maybe he hasn't thought about it like I have."

"Maybe you should talk about finances before you kill him for this shit." Rebecca suggested.

"He's already tried to take on more than his share. We can discuss it when the bills start showing up. Maybe I'm overreacting." Riza said. "It's only been a little over a week. I don't know him well enough to talk about my annual income."

Rebecca moved some boxes and then a thought occurred to her. "Speaking of income, didn't you put in for that promotion? To Briggs?"

Riza paused. Yes, she had. A promotion to Captain and a move to work under a commander she respected. "I'm sure it will be filled by someone the senior staff needs to push up the ranks."

Rebecca scoffed. "A promotion  _to Briggs_? A political puppet? Push them where? Right off the fucking wall? Since when is Briggs a sought after assignment? Granted it's one step above the East, but not very far."

Riza finally stopped mopping the floor. The repercussions of Elicia's custody agreement were starting to push past her denial and half-hearted optimism. This promotion was something she had worked hard for. Not because she had to prove herself to General Armstrong, but because she had made herself indispensable to her current commander and he was reluctant to let her leave. He had recently been transferred and it opened up an opportunity to leave Central. "I...guess I'll have to turn it down if I'm offered it."

"Riza..."

"I've made my choice, Rebecca." Riza said and picked up the mop bucket to take it outside and dump it. "Maybe this is the first step in accepting all of this. Parenting is about sacrifice and I think I need to accept it's more than just a compromise on living arrangements."

"What about Major Miles?" Rebecca asked and saw Riza pause a little before she reached for the door. There had been  _something_  between them, something that might have a lot to do with her wanting to go back to the front and go where nipples freeze off. She couldn't blame her, the man was hot enough to melt all the damned snow in the north if he took off a layer of clothing.

"We're just colleagues." Riza said and opened the door and left to dump the dirty water in the yard outside her apartment. She really needed to start worrying about the real obstacles in this arrangement and not the little things like the electric bill. Worrying about how she was going to turn down Olivier Armstrong and explain she chose a life with the 'arrogant little shit upstart' Roy Mustang instead. She was now tied to him, no matter how professional they wanted to keep this.

* * *

"Knox?"

Dr. Knox finished making his Y incision before turning to look at who was calling for him from the door. The voice was familiar, but he couldn't place it. Then he saw a face he hadn't seen in almost a year. "Roy?"

Roy had just popped his head in the door, trying to not subject Elicia to the smells or horrors that were present inside the morgue. Especially  _this_  morgue where he knew her parents had been laid out. He looked at the body Knox was currently working on and tried to not picture Maes there himself. He had been to war, seen bodies ripped apart, but...there was something so cold about being alone in here as just a body, being sliced up for examination, that could not compare to what he had previously endured. He composed himself and said, "Can I talk to you in your office?"

The doctor nodded and put his scalpel down. This was something he was expecting and he was surprised it took this long for Mustang to come asking questions. He'd want facts about his best friend's murder, and that was something he was going to have to try and convince him he _didn't_ want. So he walked into his office, expecting Roy to be standing there looking threatening and instead saw a baby on his desk and Roy with a diaper bag slung over his shoulder. "What the hell.."

"I need help and you're one of the only doctors I know in Central." Roy said.

"I work on dead people not babies!" Knox said and walked over to the desk. "When the hell did you get married?"

"I didn't." Roy said and then remembered Knox wasn't exactly big on current events, more content with staying down in the basement and forgetting about the world above. Must be nice, actually. "This is Elicia Hughes, Maes left her to me."

"He..did what?" Knox asked and looked at the baby. This was the Hughes kid? Hughes...left  _Roy Mustang_  a baby he cared about? What the fuck was he thinking?

"Maes left custody of his kid to me." Roy repeated and looked at the baby who had finally cried so much she exhausted herself. "I picked her up from the sitter and she was fine, but as the night went on she's just been screaming and miserable. She's not hungry. Doesn't want her pacifier. She went to sleep in the car, but woke up when we got here and started screaming again in the ER. I don't know what is wrong."

Knox just stared at him. "Why aren't you taking her to her pediatrician?"

"Because pediatricians have bankers hours! I came to the hospital, that seemed like the right move." Roy said and sat down in the chair with a heavy sigh. "I went to the emergency room and there were all these sick people and accident victims, so I knew I'd be waiting a long time and risk getting her sick. I came down here because I knew you'd be here. Come on Knox, they don't give you a medical degree for just working on dead people."

Knox leaned over and looked at the baby, afraid to touch her if she was quiet now and had been wailing long and loud enough to panic Roy and send him running for help. "When my son was this age, the little shit was like a gas factory. Did you change her diet?"

"We've been trying to switch her over to formula since we don't have an unlimited supply of breast milk." Roy said. Words he never thought he'd be saying in his lifetime. Bags of milk that were Elicia's only physical connection to her mother, and they were running out. Soon she'd be on artificial milk, fed by artificial parents. God, he was tired and worn down from all the screaming if he was getting philosophical about breast milk.

"Did you change how much she's eating?" Knox asked.

"We found a journal Gracia kept of all the feeding times, I think it was so Maes could scrapbook it or something. We tried feeding her according to it." Roy sat up. "She had no problems last week. I did take her to the sitter today but I can't imagine Mrs. Bradley is going to screw something up if we didn't."

Knox saw the baby start to move, little hands clenched and arms began to move, a look on her face like she was about to explode. And she did. The wailing was enough to echo off the tile walls of his office and amplify, scaring them and her...and causing her to scream even more. He watched Roy deflate and hang his head. "Do you have any experience with babies?"

"None. Just this last week with her and I thought we were doing good."

"Well," Knox picked the child up and held her, memories of long ago filtering to his mind when his son was this small and life was so very different. He started rummaging through the drawers of his desk for stethoscope. "Expect a lot of crying. It's how they communicate."

"I don't know what I'm doing or who to ask. Havoc won't answer his phone, he's probably out drinking. My Mom has no idea and doesn't need me bringing a screaming baby into her bar to drive off customers when I come looking for a girl who knows how to deal with babies. " Roy admitted. "I want to call Maes, but he's fucking  _dead_. I call and the line is busy because I'm on the phone in his house! The son of a bitch got himself killed and thought that I was a suitable replacement for him? For his daughter? What the hell was he thinking?"

"Roy," Knox said and handed him the baby to stop his meltdown. "Mankind would have never evolved if babies were impossible to take care of. Sometimes, you just have to realize that shit is out of your hands and all you can do is cry and scream even if it won't change anything."

"Are you talking about me or the baby?"

"It's life as we know it." Knox said and found his stethoscope and pulled the box out and blew the dust off of it. He opened it up and held the diaphragm in his hands to warm it up. He realized Roy was here for more than just help diagnosing the baby. This was a man who kept his head high and marched into battle without sign of fear, a man who never showed outward signs of indecision or the wear of his position. And he was brought to his knees by a baby this fast.

"I have no idea what I'm doing." Roy admitted.

"You're asking for help, nobody is going to fault you for that. You have her best interest at mind." Knox knelt down next to him to place his stethoscope in his ears and have a listen. "Great set of lungs."

Roy snorted. Elicia continued to scream. "Gets that from her father."

Knox listened to her abdomen and heard some gurgling and pings that sounded like gas. He took his stethoscope off and said, "I'm not a specialist but I don't hear anything out of the ordinary. Sounds like she has a little gas and maybe you might want to discuss with your babysitter not to let the kid gorge herself. Her belly is a little distended. It could be from gas, but I think you're in for a night of full diapers."

"She can overeat?" Roy asked.

"I once watched you and Hughes try to stab each other with forks over the last piece of spinach quiche in Ishval." Knox stood up. "It was made with powdered eggs and I think the spinach was actually paper particles that fell in the mixer. There wasn't another man in the officer's club that would touch that shit and you two ate the whole fucking thing. I bet you felt a lot like her after doing so."

Roy smiled a little despite the screaming child and wrapped her back up in her blanket. He and Maes spent that night in the latrine, shitting and laughing and hating themselves. That quiche felt like ten tons of sand had impacted itself in their gut later that night and was not pretty when it came out. He missed him, god how he missed him. "So she's going to be OK?"

"Just keep an eye on her." Knox said and pulled a notebook over and wrote down some names of doctors in the hospital that specialized in pediatric care. "Make an appointment with her regular doctor and talk to them about any issues she's been experiencing or had a history of. Get to know them, use your charm to get an emergency number. Until then, for tonight, here are a couple doctors in this hospital who are better with dealing with the living than I am."

"Thanks." Roy said and held her close to his chest, feeling bad that he didn't talk about volumes of feed with Mrs. Bradley when he dropped her off this morning. Elicia kept screaming and he couldn't help but feel like this was his doing. He didn't leave good instructions, that was his fault as the one in charge.

"It's going to be rough, but it's worth it." Knox assured him. "You and your wife should be just fine."

"I'm... not married." Roy responded again. Did he just not hear him the first time or did it not sink in? 

Knox cocked an eyebrow. "You said 'we' and I assumed..."

"Yeah, me and Gracia's friend Riza are taking joint custody of Elicia. That's what Maes and Gracia wanted. We're not married. Hell, we're not even friends."

What the hell was Hughes thinking!?

From the look on Knox's face and the silence from the man, he felt compelled to make a case for himself. Knox knew him though, knew him from the war when he had been an army doctor. More recently he knew him from when Hughes had drug him in here with what he assumed was alcohol poisoning. Last year. Hughes had the same idea, come down and call in a favor from a friend in the less traveled section of the hospital. Maes was trying to avoid having this show up on his medical records, he was always looking out for him. "I know it's going to take a lot to change, I'm well aware of the mess I am and how unqualified I am...but I'd do anything for Hughes. I'd give my life for him, he knew that, and he took me up on the offer."

Knox understood the noble intentions, but noble intentions didn't save him or his own marriage. He looked over at the picture on the desk, a photo of his wife and son from the days prior to war turning him into a unpredictable mess that almost strangled the love of his life in his sleep. Roy struggled with the same things, it's why he was so inclined to help him when Hughes drug his limp form down here. It's why he let Roy spend the night on table in the morgue puking his guts out instead of admitting him to the hospital. He saw a lot of his own struggles in the kid. Noble intentions. "Forget what I just said. It's going to be a lot of nights of not sleeping and the kid screaming and you not being able to do anything but let her. Are you prepared for that?"

Roy blinked. Elicia was screaming now. He was handling it OK, but he knew what Knox was asking. What he was  _really_  asking. Could he distinguish between being woken up by the screams of a colicky child and woken up from a nightmare by the screams of men in agony somewhere out on the battlefield? Could he handle his own issues if he swore off his lifestyle of booze and women and unconscious nights on a friend's couch, a couch he now called home? A life without his best friend. "Are you asking me if I'm capable of hurting her?"

Knox hung his head. "I see a lot down here, Roy. Babies end up on the slabs too. Parents who just wanted the baby to stop crying, or wanted a few drinks before falling a sleep with the baby on the couch. I rule them what they are,  _accidents,_ but I can see on the parents faces that isn't the word for it. "

Roy felt the impact of that statement harder than the kick to the gut when he was told Hughes was killed.

"You're responsible for another human life, I know you can take that responsibility in stride. However she's not a soldier, she's helpless and needs a father not a supervisor. She needs you to be able to walk away and call in reserve forces when you're too tired or can't deal with it. She needs you to find time for yourself to sort through your frustrations before you deal with her. Babies are a lot of stress." Knox sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm telling you this as a father. I'm telling you this because you have to hear it from someone who isn't going to sugar coat this. It can be your salvation, but you have to be aware it can be your downfall too. There is no shame in just admitting you've had enough and turning her over to someone else for just a little while. You have to develop the eye to see it in your partner too. It's rough, but it's worth it."

"Knox..."

"First thing that has to go is this noble bullshit about doing it for Hughes." Knox said and poked Roy in the shoulder with his finger. "You do this, you commit to it for the baby because Hughes is gone. You're the one here who has to make the decision on what is best for her. Hughes wasn't planning to die, trust me, nobody expects to end up down here. Nobody. It was a contingency plan to make himself feel better, knowing he planned for the 'worst case scenario', just like buying house insurance. You have it 'just in case' but do you walk out your door every morning and think about your homeowner's policy? No, you put it to the back of your mind as 'taken care of' and that's that. Nobody actually thinks they're going to end up down here."

Roy looked down as Elicia cried a little less and he smelled a god awful stench coming from her.

"See, gas." Knox said and put his stethoscope away and prepared to go back to the dead whose problems were no longer their own, but those of loved ones. "I guess you can call me if you need something. I don't make house calls though."

Roy smiled weakly at him. He was more help than he could know. "Thanks Doc."


	7. Bargaining

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 7

**Bargaining**

* * *

"Mrs. Bradley was apologetic about overfeeding Elicia, she admitted she was a little excited to have a baby to care for again and might have offered her too much to eat out of pure joy. I think she was scared she might lose her job, she committed to writing down all feedings and regulating the baby's intake."

Havoc leaned over the desk as Roy reported in about his morning. The new morning routine meant Roy showed up for work even earlier than his staff. He had committed to driving Elicia to the sitter and carpooling with Hawkeye to work. Together they dropped the baby off and talked to the Fuhrer and his wife before continuing on to work for the day. So now, thanks to Hawkeye, he was punctual and in the Fuhrer's favor. Maybe. "And how did Bradley react to you lecturing his wife on bottle feeding?"

"I can do no wrong." Roy said with a smile. "I was almost late for work because the Fuhrer had to share some story about his brother, Tony, and how he was the baby that gorged himself when he was little. They used to call him Gluttony because he ate everything."

"The Fuhrer has a brother?" Havoc asked.

Roy sat back in his chair and laughed. "I had no idea! Apparently he has several siblings. Now they call Gluttony 'Gluten Tony' because he has to have everything gluten free when he comes over. Something Bradley seems to attribute to his food intake as a kid. Definite vibes of him being appalled by how his brother doesn't take care of his body and goes a long way to explain why Bradley is so fit for an older guy. Also they love fruit and vegetables in that house, they are adamant about healthy living. He gave me a melon."

 _Fuck_  Mustang and his damned charmed life! Havoc could not believe how things just unfolded before him sometimes. Sure this situation was a tragedy, but in the wake of it all things were just smooth sailing.

"Of course that lead to a weird conversation about Gracia's diet and her breast milk and how maybe Elicia has some food allergies? They're really focused on this gluten thing." Roy shrugged. "They were actually talking about Gracia like she was a cow. Riza and I had to get out of there. They could still be talking about it for all I know."

"So, this is your first night off in a week." Havoc asked. "Any hot dates planned?"

Roy thought about Knox's comments last night, about making sure he got away from it all before the surface started to crack. He pulled out his little black book and wondered if Vanessa would just let him sleep in her bed for a few hours after work. God he could use a nap, he was absolutely exhausted. There was responsibility for you, paying a prostitute to let you just sleep uninterrupted for a few hours. "Now that you mention it..."

* * *

Riza waited for the gossip to settle down and get old. She and Roy arrived in the mornings together after dropping off Elicia at the sitters. Then they began to have lunch together and she had to admit she actually enjoyed his company. They would talk about the baby and anything household related that needed to be taken care of, then let each other know about plans for the evening. She wasn't surprised when Roy said he was going out on a date, she was surprised that the rumors about them seemed to drop off the day after.

It helped her relax around him, helped her feel like maybe the pressure wasn't actually getting to them to be more than guardians for Elicia. It made her realize how she had been so very careful to not show too much to this man she was now living with. It was actually better for her that he went on dates because it gave her some time to be alone in the house she was desperately trying to tell herself was home.

She and Roy, for the most part, were getting along really well. They agreed that Saturday night would be family time, time spent playing poker with old Generals at her grandfather's place. It was somewhere that was neutral for her, a place she was comfortable and also without the looks or questions from the public. When she took Elicia on a walk through the park with Hayate she encountered the strangers who gravitated towards babies with dumb baby talk and the unsolicited advice about raising said baby. The comments about Elicia's beautiful eyes and how she must have gotten them from her father were the ones that struck home. Beautiful green eyes, that she got from  _her Mom_.

Those people didn't know, they were just talking and passing on harmless compliments. Hayate started sensing her agitation and sorrow and started to get a little protective of her and the baby, so she stopped going to the park. However she knew, looking over at the playground, someday she was going to have to deal with it. For now, Roy enjoyed going to the park and all the attention he got for holding a baby. That, she could let him have.

She felt like things were settling down, until the end of the week came and she was leaving to go home and she literally ran into someone she was hoping she wouldn't have to deal with for at least another month.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye." Major Miles put his arms on hers when she bumped into her chest and then let go when it was obvious she wasn't going to stumble due to the surprise collision. He took off his glasses as he smiled at the women he was looking forward to seeing for almost two months. He saw the smile as she laid eyes on him and then it faded a little, he assumed the weight of what she was dealing with crushed her enthusiasm a little. "Sorry I didn't call. General Armstrong sent me down here to guard a shipment of contraband and I thought I'd see if you were free for dinner?"

Two weeks ago, she would have smiled and felt a flush of excitement like a schoolgirl. Today, however, all she saw was the future she worked for standing in front of her waiting to be pushed away. Everything had to happen at once, she couldn't recover from one hit before another wave threatened to take her feet out from under her. "Major..."

"I'm sorry to hear about your friend." Miles wasn't one to interrupt, especially not a woman, but he had grown fond of Riza and knew her well enough to anticipate her reaction. They didn't need to discuss the implications of her new role on things already set in motion, he just wanted to make sure she knew it didn't effect how he saw her. Well, it did, but his admiration only grew. "I called but your phone was disconnected and I didn't want to bother you at work. Some things, I think, are best said in person anyhow."

"Thanks." She was at a loss for words. He was such a good man. "Things changed so quickly, I didn't think to let anyone know about my change of address."

"Understandable." He said. "The General informed me about the details of your new living arrangement. She's been rather vocal about it, which is amusing considering she's never been one to care for the Central gossip. Her brother was able to give her details, so a reliable source I assume?"

Riza felt for the first time in two weeks someone was actually here for her. Not in the respect that they saw some opportunity she needed to be pushed towards, or questioning her resolve or ability to see the situation for what it was, but honest to God standing there wanted to know if she was needing a shoulder to lean on. "Yes. I also forgot to follow up with the General and let her know I will have to withdraw my application for the position at Briggs."

Miles smiled at her. "I believe the General's instructions were, and I quote, 'Don't you dare let her withdraw her application. You hear me? Does anybody actually believe Roy Mustang is capable of taking care of a baby? He can't even take care of himself unless he's helping himself to whatever he wants! That arrogant shit will crash and burn in less than a month if child services doesn't come to the rescue first. We can make arrangements for Daycare, Briggs is home to plenty of families. That baby girl can have some real role models that aren't womanizing sacks of shit like Mustang!'"

Riza had to crack a smile. Miles really knew how to imitate his General, right down to the hand gestures and speech patterns. "As much as I appreciate the General's...dedication... to seeing this promotion through, I don't see myself able to leave Central in the next eighteen years."

"Can you leave for maybe a few  _hours_  and perhaps go to Hagaren Cafe for dinner with me tonight?" Miles asked. "I don't mind if you bring the baby."

"Actually, it's my day off. Roy has Elicia tonight." Riza said and felt a little bad about going out on a date, but Roy had taken no time to go back to his regular routine in that respect and she honestly could use a break. Life had to maintain some degree of normal if they were going to survive this. Not that dating was part of her normal routine, but she was one to seize the opportunity when Miles was in town. "I'll call him and see if he wouldn't mind taking Hayate home with him."

Miles smiled at her and saw a look of relaxation that had yet to happen during this conversation. Riza was never one to be shy about their occasional dates nor the sex that usually followed. He hated to admit that he shared his commander's sentiments about Mustang and was relieved to watch Olivier dump the promotion files in her desk drawer and declare she'd push the decision off as long as she had to.

* * *

Roy pulled up to the house and noticed the lights were on in the living room as well as the upstairs. Riza was home. He was glad she had a date tonight, it made him feel less awful about going out with Vanessa twice this week, especially since Elicia had been really colicky again today and he knew he was in for a long night. They didn't have an appointment with the pediatrician until next week so he ran back to Knox as soon as he felt overwhelmed. The doctor was less cranky this time and actually walked them upstairs to a doctor specializing in living, breathing people for advice. He got a nurses phone number, several actually, and it seemed he had garnered some fame from the newspaper's coverage of the Chopper case. Nurses, he could call for help and possibly treat to dinner at some point for their experise. Sometimes he hated himself for how well he could manipulate a situation to his advantage.

He got out of the car and went to the back seat to get Elicia out and also let Hayate out of the passenger side. The first week seemed like it was a breeze compared to this past one where it seemed like every time he touched the baby she had a problem and he was absolutely useless. He opened the door to let the dog out, the well behaved pup would only leave the car when told. He was actually pretty excited Riza was letting him share custody of the pup, petting and playing with Hayate was a great way to let go of his stress. "Ok Hayate, you can get out."

"What a good boy!" He watched the dog leap out and then closed the door, then went to the back door to get the baby out of her car seat. "Ok Elicia, want to get out?"

The baby moved a little and then went back to sleep.

"Now you're acting like me and I'm acting like your Dad. Hoping you're enjoying the irony of this Hughes." He picked her up, along with her bag of everything, and closed the car door. Hayate walked alongside of him and he saw the neighbors come out and 'check the mail'. The neighborhood watch. Everyone here knew how Hughes was with his precious child and was just waiting to pounce on the new neighbors to see how they were doing with the task themselves. He had successfully avoided them, but knew it was just a matter of time. Right now, dealing with everyone at work while figuring all this out was enough on his plate.

"Hello?" Roy said as he walked into the house and it was warm and the radio was playing. He knew Riza had a date tonight and the last thing he wanted to do was walk in on something happening on  _his_  couch with Major Miles. No, the last thing he wanted was Elicia to wake up because of him walking in on something.

"Hi!"

That..seemed uncharacteristic for Riza. He thought she'd be greeting him at the door, asking about her dog and the baby, but instead she wasn't meeting him in the foyer. Hayate trotted off into the living room and Roy cautiously followed and looked around. Riza was on the couch, a bottle of wine on the table and there was nobody else. Weird she was in here, she seemed content to just surrender the room to him and taking the upstairs for herself. "Date go well?"

"Yes." Riza said and watched Roy come in and set the baby down in her play pen. "I mean, for my standards I guess. Dinner...only. No sex. I can still be happy with that."

Roy turned and looked at her. Clearly she wasn't handling his dating routines well. He knew that would be an issue. "You've been drinking."

"Thanks  _Colonel Obvious_." She said and pointed to the bottle. "I bought it for Gracia, but she couldn't drink it because she was pregnant and then breastfeeding. I had some wine at dinner, thought I might try it."

"Good stuff?" Roy asked and picked up the bottle. It was one step above wine bricks. It definitely was  _not_  good stuff.

"Nope." Riza said and help it up to look at it. "I couldn't afford good stuff. It's wine, not really your thing, so I didn't want to offer. You're a hard and fast kinda guy, wine takes more commitment."

Roy walked over and looked down at her, her eyes were blurry. This was really uncharacteristic for her, he never though there was a version of Riza Hawkeye in there that would indulge in alcohol to the point of actually loosing a little bit of control. This was a night for irony, apparently. She was acting like him. "Did Miles get you drunk?"

"No." She hissed. "He's a gentlemen, he brought me home when I got tipsy. We talked about Elicia and Gracia and I just kept drinking and talking and drinking..."

So that was it. She was coping with the loss of her friend, something neither of them really had a chance to do. Roy leaned on the couch arm and said softly. "Let's get you to bed."

"I wanted  _him_  to take me to bed, not you. I just wanted some great sex and forget about all of this for a while, but how can I bring him home to this house?" Riza asked. "I should have asked what hotel you recommend for your 'dates' with your lady friends."

"Riza." Roy said and closed his eyes. "Do we need to talk about my dates?"

"God  _no_. I don't need to know what you do. I mean, I thought about that with you but you were such  _an asshole_." She said and laughed when his eyes opened and he looked at her surprised. Like even he didn't think she's stoop that low. "I though that maybe you'd just be some no strings attached one night stand, but it was too many strings attached. Maes would have never let it just be that. Then I would make tension between Gracia and him, because she knows the only use I had for you was your dick."

"It's really good to know you're an honest drunk." He said. He had to admit she was right. He was an asshole, and it would have been a complicated hook up. Hughes would have been hounding him about details, trying to convince him that Riza was 'the one.' Would have been nice to know all she wanted was casual sex though. That he could have accommodated.

"It's good to know you're the slutty asshole I thought you were." She said and snorted. "God knows how much that one night would have really cost."

"I don't have any diseases." He snapped, offended. God, he really didn't want to admit he was spending money on prostitutes so he could get some sleep. Or help with the baby. He'd rather have her think he was seeking comfort in the beds of random women than admit how much he was struggling, that made him every bit the asshole she thought he was. However this was going to be a rift between them, so he asked again, "So we need to talk about my dates?"

"No." Riza pointed to his little black book on the table. "I see you can't keep them straight yourself so you have to write them down."

Roy groaned.  _Shit!_ "That's not what that's for."

"I bet it's not. Not for anyone but you to read and take little notes about Vanessa and her favorite appetizers and desserts. Or Madeline and how she likes take out and the back seat of your car...by the way our baby is not going to be in until you have it cleaned. You hear that Hayate, you call shotgun!"

Roy went over and picked up the book. He forgot about that when he rushed out of the house to go to the hospital. He was tired, this was evidence of that.

"Don't have anything to say?" Riza chuckled and set her glass down on the table. "Put that in your book, your tongue doesn't work on  _me_."

He shoved the book in his pocket and turned to watch her try to pour from the bottle without getting it on the table. She didn't drink that much of it, which meant that Miles probably brought her home half wasted. He was a good guy, probably the kind of guys she deserved. "Let's get you upstairs."

Riza let him pull her up off the couch and lead her to the stairs. "So carefree about your reputation and sexual adventures  _and hair_. I couldn't handle being that messy. Looking that...shallow. Seriously, what is with  _your hair_?"

Roy felt her run her hand through his hair and tried to not enjoy it. She was so focused on it, so close to him to see if she could learn the magic of his hair style by looking closer...close enough to smell wine on her breath and the scent of her shampoo. He was glad when he heard a knock on the door and had to pry her off him to see who it was. He opened it and looked down at an old lady who was unfamiliar and looked like she was selling something. Fucking neighbor probably, he just responded as curtly as he could before he slammed the door in her face. "I'm sorry, we're not interested."

"Mr. Mustang?" The woman's voice was gravelly.

" _Colonel_ Mustang." Roy said before he managed to slam the door and heard Riza scoff at his correction, muttering something about him being an ass.

"I'm Pinako Rockbell, with child services."

Roy looked through the opening between door and jam and just stared at her. He could feel Riza pushing at him, trying to see who was at the door and why he was only opening the door part way. She was grabbing at his midsection now, trying to tickle him but distracted by his firm muscles under his shirt. Now she was trying to pull his shirt out his pants to see. God help him, he was possibly going to explode out of his pants and poke this short ladies eye out if Riza got any further. "We already met with child services."

"And I am the surprise in home visit you were told about and..."

Roy closed the door as the woman asked if she could come in. He turned to Riza who was holding onto his shirt and said, "Child Services is here.  _Right now_. Get upstairs and take a shower and sober up.  _Now_."

"No." Riza whispered in horror. Those words were enough to sober her up a little. Damn her! Damn her for letting go a little and having some damned wine and trying to be human. Dammit! She wanted to see what was under his shirt!

"It's fine, I got this" He whispered. "Just go."

Roy opened the door again once Riza staggered her way upstairs. "Sorry, I didn't want the dog to bark and wake up the baby. She's sleeping. Not that the dog bothers her. He's awesome. A great dog. I love dogs!"

Pinako walked in the house and looked around. "The file says there is also a Riza Hawkeye that is a co-guardian."

"Yes, she's taking a shower. She is a clean woman. Smells good." Roy said and darted into the living room when he saw the wine bottle and glasses. He pointed at Elicia as he zipped in front of Pinako and over to the table. He snapped and pointed, "That's the baby!"

The dog came up and sniffed her hand then went back to sit beside the play pen as she heard glasses clinking and Mustang trying to hide evidence of  _something_. "I'll be blunt, Mustang."

"Ok." Roy said and held the bottle and glass behind his back and went over to the short woman. He smiled. "I like direct."

"This situation doesn't look promising." Pinako said and looked up at him. "Two strangers, without any parenting experience, walking into a house and just assuming control of this little girls life and future. It's not that simple."

"We know." Roy assured her.

"No,  _you don't_. You have good intentions. You haven't a clue what having a kid is like." Pinako said and sighed. "Actually you probably do, you aren't married and don't have kids so I am assuming at some point you realized you weren't ready for that in your life yet. Or ever."

"Ok, you're a little bitter for this job." Roy said and she looked at him and narrowed her eyes like she saw through every layer of his bullshit.

"I've seen it all, Mustang. I've developed an eye for people who can make it work and who can't. I've looked through your files, I've looked at the newspapers and read all about you. It's admirable what you're doing, but this is not about  _you_. It's about Elicia."

"I know that..." Roy said and realized with his hands full he couldn't grab her and push her out of the house. To get his hands empty he would have to reveal the wine glasses and bottle that made it look like they were celebrating something or getting warmed up for sex. It left him the option of kicking her out, literally, which he'd reserve as an option for pure desperation.

"And I see a baby who is at the age where she could be placed in a loving home and leave this tragedy behind her. With a couple who is dying to have a child, but can't. A couple longing for a missing piece of their lives." Pinako said.

Roy looked at the sleeping baby. The impact of Pinako's words hitting him as she turned and looked up at him with defiant eyes. He was once that kid standing there listening to someone like Pinako telling his Aunt that there were better families out there, his Aunt asking if that meant erasing the ties to the name Mustang and his real parents. The answer was, 'yes, do what's best for the child' and in doing so...sever the connection to the dead parents that would only cause pain.  _Fuck_ no. So he lowered his voice and the hostile bite made sure she knew he saw though  _her_  bullshit to the real meaning behind her statement. "You think she should be with a couple who would never let her know who her real parents were? You would go against her parents wishes just because you think  _you_  know better?"

" _Parents_." Pinako emphasized. "Not friends who have no experience in parenting or even a working relationship with their partner."

"How about you get the hell out of this house? Is that parental enough for you?" Roy growled and Hayate perked up as he realized he needed to put himself between the baby's pen and this stranger. Roy realized that the 'kicking the lady out' card might be pretty closed to being played.

"Nobody is truly ready for their first child. Even when it's a surprise, you have the entire pregnancy to grow into the idea of parenthood when your child comes into this world. People need to be prepared for their lives to change this drastically." Pinako said, at least Mustang was prepared to fight her over this. He was a solider, a Colonel, that was expected. It was his job.

"You don't get to lecture me about expectations versus reality." Roy said and looked up as Riza came in the room. Of course it looked like he was just being a dick to this woman.

"What Roy means is..." Riza said and walked over to the couch to see that he had picked up her wine and had it behind his back. "We're all adjusting to the reality of this change and committed to it."

Pinako turned to look at her, Riza Hawkeye. A sniper. That said a lot about her. "So how does this work, you two?"

"We share responsibilities." Riza said.

"Are you sleeping together?"

"NO!" They replied emphatically.

"Right." Pinako went over to a chair and sat down. "Alright, sit down and let's get this interview started."

"It's 2000 hours." Roy said dryly.

"It's a surprise visit so sit down Mustang."

Roy finally gave up and placed the bottle and glass on the table and sat down. Riza came over and sat down beside him.

"You're both military, have you considered what will happen if one of you is transferred or deployed?" Pinako asked and looked up at them to see if they fidgeted.

"It's always in the back of our minds." Riza looked at the wine bottle. It was the reason she indulged tonight. Miles had brought with him an offer to transfer to Briggs, a move she had been considering for a year. The job was hers if she wanted it and Olivier Armstrong, of all people, was stalling to give her that opportunity. It was more than just a promotion; it was a move away from Central and the feeling that she just would never feel like she belonged back in society after the war and a move away from all the officers who didn't appreciate her because she was a woman. A promotion and serving under a General she truly admired and the implications of something more with a handsome Major who delivered the news. A Major who had listened to her talk about her dead friend all night, who had casually mentioned he wasn't so bad with kids. God she wanted to give Roy a chance, she wanted to believe what Maes said about him, but nobody in this room would argue that Miles wasn't a better candidate for father than Mustang.

"How will that work with a baby? This house? This arrangement?" Pinako asked and wrote down notes.

"We'll have that discussion when it happens and we will adapt." Riza said. After seeing Roy's little black book she had considered having that discussion. He was not a role model for Elicia. Why did he even bring her to meet his mother and try to make her think he had respect for women if he couldn't wean himself off going out and doing  _whatever_  with his little harem of women? She didn't want to judge him, but she had to now because of Elicia.

"Isn't that what a real family would do?" Roy asked and Riza elbowed him in the ribs to tell him to quit antagonizing the lady. Or maybe it was for implying they were a family. He wanted to give her space to grieve however she wanted, whether it be with wine and Miles or telling him the truth about what she really thought about him, but now wasn't the time. He needed the hard ass Lieutenant to have his back right now.

"It sounds to me like you have issue with the military and not us." Riza said coldly. "Perhaps when  _you_  can address this situation objectively you can come back."

Pinako raised an eyebrow. She wasn't used to defensive adoption candidates, they usually went overboard trying to please her. She had to admit, maybe her own feelings were jading her view of this a little. "It's early enough in your shared custody arrangement that maybe you have not had enough time to discuss everything. I'll give you that. My intentions this evening were to drop in and inspect the conditions you are raising Elicia in and ensure standards are being met."

"Good thing we're gauging ourselves against higher standards than yours." Roy said coldly and looked up at the Hughes's wedding photo over the fireplace. He got another elbow jab for that, but much lighter. Riza was just asking him to not piss this little woman off at this point.

Pinako stood and walked over to place a business card next to the wine glass and bottle. Then gave them a curt smile. "I'll look forward to our next meeting and hearing your answers in our interview. Until then have a nice night. I'll see myself out."

When she was gone they both let loose a sigh of relief. Riza looked over at Roy first, he seemed fixated on the photo but broke his stare to turn to her. "I'm sorry about tonight."

"We can talk about..."

"No, that's not necessary." Riza said and stood up to grab the wine and glass to clean up. "That lady was right, we still are new to this and each other and I had no right to judge you like I did. Life ended for Gracia and Maes so quickly and life changed for Elicia instantly...but you and I are going to have to take time to figure life out. We can't avoid that. It's going to take time."

Roy nodded and watched her turn to leave. He should explain himself, but he couldn't. So much of who he was revolved around this persona he created that giving up truths about himself to someone he didn't quiet trust, well it would do no good for anyone.

"I'm going to bed." She said and gave him a smile. Tomorrow was Saturday, family day. They could talk then. Right now she just wanted to go to bed and scold herself for this weakness she exhibited and make sure it didn't happen again. "See you in the morning."

"Good night." He said and settled back down into the couch, staring at Hughes's smile and vowing he wasn't going to let him down. No matter what this world thought of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help myself with the Gluttony/Gluten Tony thing. Nor the Hagaren Cafe. I amuse myself.


	8. Bonding

_Catalyst_

Chapter 8

**Bonding**

* * *

Morning came and so did the wave of embarrassment and regret. Riza slept in longer than normal, not because of the repercussions of her drinking, but because of the dread of having to go downstairs and face Roy after everything she had said. It was unavoidable and probably for the best it happened early on in the arrangement, but that was still not helping her build up the courage to go downstairs. She sat up and ran her hand through her hair and waited for Hayate to come over as see if he could get on the bed.

Except Hayate didn't come over.

She frowned as she noticed his dog bed was empty and her bedroom door was cracked open. She closed her eyes out of frustration. This morning was already going to hell. Yesterday she thought the sun would rise on her laying beside a gorgeous man, her body relaxed and her mind clear from their activities the night before. They would talk about the promotion she desperately wanted to accept and maybe, just maybe, she could talk to someone about what she could realistically expect from Roy Mustang in this guardianship arrangement. She flopped back down into her pillow. Instead, it was way past daybreak, there was no Miles in her bed and no Hayate to comfort her and Roy was downstairs taking care of the baby by himself.

She was so worried Roy would fail her but so far he had gone above and beyond to make this situation work. She thought it was misplaced grief or guilt, but that could only last so long. If anything, she was the one wallowing in her grief and feeling sorry for herself. These were the times she missed Gracia the most, times when she needed someone to confide in, someone who would give her an objective view and allow her to process the facts on her own. Her grandfather and Rebecca were too wrapped up in this fairy tale, and she couldn't blame them for wanting her to be happy. Being happy, however, had been about being alone and sacrificing for others. It's how she found value in herself, purpose. Family, love, warmth...had always been for other people and not her.

She took a deep breath and smelled something. Breakfast? It was well beyond just coffee, it smelled of bacon and toast and more. She stared at the ceiling, there was no avoiding starting this morning with apologies and awkward conversation so she rolled out of bed. Her eyes focused on the sight of Hayate's empty bed and she bitterly thought ' _loyal canine, my ass'_. She used the bathroom and brushed her hair and decided to see what Roy was cooking and how much of that cooking he was sharing with her dog. She made her way downstairs and the smell only increased as she approached the kitchen. This was probably what Elicia was used to, the smells of a home cooked meal even if she wasn't old enough to have any of the food. A stark contrast to the home she had grown up in.

" _Glu, Glu, Glu , Glu Gluten Free..."_  Roy sang softly as he rocked his hips gently to imaginary music. He held Elicia as he flipped a pancake and she spit bubbles and drooled on herself. It was keeping her quiet, so he kept singing and cooking. Last night had scared him, the idea that some stranger could come into Maes's home and deem him unfit to protect the one piece of his best friend that remained in this world...it gave him a lot to think about. He heard Hayate get up trot across the kitchen, Riza must have finally gotten up. He kept his eyes on the pancake, it was too easy to burn them.

Riza watched him dance and sing with the baby as he made pancakes for breakfast. She put her head against the door frame and smiled, trying to not ogle him too much as he was in lounge pants and a tee shirt that hugged him tightly. He  _was_  a very good looking man, it was impossible to not notice, more importantly he had his faults but was trying. He wanted to like him, she actually was fighting herself to not like him too much, he could be very endearing. She couldn't expect him to just give up his lifestyle, especially when Elicia was too young to ever know any better. "Was the pancake mix Gluten Free? Am I going to have to stand next to you while you tell Mrs. Bradley she's wrong again?"

Roy put a pancake on a plate and was finally free to look at her. He turned to her and smiled. She didn't look any worse for wear from drinking last night and he envied her for that. She looked beautiful in the morning, before she had a chance to prepare herself for the day; Before she had a chance to prepare herself to face him in the place they called home. "No, it's blueberry. I found a can in the cabinet, so not fresh blueberry. It's playing hell with my ability to make pancake animals and practice my craft."

She walked to the counter and poured herself some coffee. She wasn't sure how to apologize for last night, or how to open up discussion about child services. It was easy to do at work, it was easy to make preparations and tell everyone their tasks, but here she was dealing with a situation that couldn't be 'handled' like a mission. "About last night..."

"Yes, about last night." Roy said and pushed her the pancakes he just made. He sighed. "I tried to make them dick shaped but with the blueberries it makes it look like it's diseased. I guess it's the expectations you have of me anyhow, so...enjoy!"

She stared at it. The dick pancake was quite obviously a dick shaped pancake. It was bad enough until he made it worse by pulling out the syrup and pouring a little on the tip. She had no choice but to start laughing. She looked at him to determine what the hell this was and his grin told her he was just having an immature moment of fun at her expense.

"You said you only had one use for me so here it is." Roy giggled a little, a little too unmanly for his tastes but he was hardly being a man here. "It can be an invite too, in case you ever want no strings attached satisfaction I'm right down here on the couch."

She took a fork and stabbed the shaft and then cut the pancake in half with the edge of the fork. Roy gave her a pout. He was cute, and this was a clever way of trying diffuse a situation that she created. "That's kind of you, but I think I'll pass."

"Just offering. I would hate for you to be left wondering what you missed out on...especially after you practically groped me last night." Roy said and he watched her take a bite of the pancake and made sure she was still grinning at him. She was.

The pancake was actually really good. "You sit at a desk all day and have terrible eating and drinking habits, how do you have abs?"

Roy lifted up his shirt and flashed her a view of the abs in question. She stopped chewing and actually looked like she might want to grab him again. "I have trouble sleeping so I work out."

"I never thought you were the type." Riza admitted.

"Old habits I guess." Roy shrugged. "Maybe a little bit of fear. I don't want to become one of those...spongy old officers sitting around a conference room table."

But he didn't mind being that soggy drunk on his best friend's couch? Or the slutty Colonel who kept a book of womens names in his pocket? "That's a lot of exercise."

"Insomnia is a cruel mistress." He admitted. He poured the rest of the batter in the pan. "Do you want a non phallic pancake? I made a dinosaur too!"

"No thanks." Riza said and finished eating what she had already been served. It was absolutely delicious. "I am not a big fan of breakfast."

"I'll start you off slow..." Roy said and flipped another pancake over. His voice sultry and low. "Work you up to the big stuff."

"You're not big on breakfast either." She reminded him. He had refused Mrs. Bradley's breakfast sandwiches and got a lecture about proper nutrition. She also wasn't going to encourage his raunchy comments, she really was having a hard time with the disappointment of not being with Miles last night.

"Yeah, well I have to change a lot of my habits I guess." Roy said and put the pancake on the plate, turned off the stove and bounced Elicia a little.

"Sorry I overslept." Riza said and reached out to take Elicia from him. How could she be so judgmental of Roy when he was doing more than his share here. How was he handling this all better than him?

"Not a problem." He said and picked up his breakfast to go sit down at the table. He wondered if she would break her own rule of 'Saturday should be family day.' since her date went so poorly last night. He doubted it, but he figured it would be good to offer. Clearly she had a healthy relationship going, whereas he was less than ideal in that department. "So what's the plan for the day?"

"We need to do some grocery shopping." Riza said and added eggs to the list since the carton was empty on the counter. "Poker night is tonight, my grandfather called me everyday to remind me."

"Did you want to skip that?" Roy asked and watched her pause as she wrote down a few items on the shopping list. "I gathered your date didn't go as planned last night, I can't imagine General Armstrong approves furloughs that often. I'd understand."

Riza wondered if she really came across so desperate last night that Roy would be offering to help her get laid twice in less than ten minutes. "No. I think this routine is important to establish now. It's not going to get any easier as time goes by and honestly I don't want it to feel like something that gets in the way of what we want to do. I already told the Major I had plans and I meant it."

"Just wanted to offer." Roy said and decapitated his dinosaur pancake.

"I appreciate it." She said and wiped some spit from Elicia's mouth. This was going to be about sacrifices and the first casualty would be her relationship with Miles and the second, her career. The sooner she accepted that, the easier it would be. "I'll give her a bath. Then we can go shopping."

* * *

Roy was in a playful mood since the morning and she suspected it was caused by sleep deprivation. Elicia probably kept him up all night while he tried to let her sleep off her intoxication. Maybe this was the Roy that Maes had known was lurking under the surface. Despite all the bad things she had heard said about him, there was a fierce loyalty to him from all the people who knew or served him. She had seen Hughes at work, a man capable of being a hard edged interrogator one second and then an obnoxious gushing father the next. Maybe they had both learned to hide their true nature in the same manner, because this version of Roy was more disruptive than the baby they were in charge of. Grocery shopping was suddenly more exciting for everyone as another woman was ensnared by Roy's charm while he was checking out apples. When he came back with his chosen fruit she noticed he had a phone number written on his hand. "I don't know if I should be impressed or appalled."

"I can't help it." Roy said. "I fondle fruit and women can't help but be drawn to me."

"Right." Riza rolled her eyes and pushed the cart on to the next section of produce. As soon as he wandered away from the shopping cart, her, and the baby, it seemed like the women just gravitated towards him. Jaws dropped. Drool puddles formed on the floor. It was ridiculous and possibly a sanitation issue.

Roy leaned over the cart as he placed his bag of apples delicately in the basket and said, " _You_  ate my dick this morning."

She had to smile, as much as she didn't want to. He said it so playfully, and she knew he wanted to be carefree and immature right now. She had seen this before, in the way he and Maes would banter and screw around, childish and stupid fun. She doubted that was the first dick shaped pancake he had served up for breakfast at the Hughes household. So she leaned on the cart and played along, because they were going to need to be friends if this situation was going to work. More importantly, they were going to have to be able to be themselves. "I did. It was satisfying. I enjoyed the little bursts of flavor even if they were visually unpleasant, but overall not very filling."

He felt a wave of surprise and a real smile touch his face, a genuine feeling of joy for the first time in weeks. He had to bite his lip to stop himself from giggling as he fondled the bag of apples a little and said, "I like a commanding woman, maybe you should tell me how you like it then?"

She suppressed a smile, poorly. There was a man by the lemons rolling his eyes at them. "How about we finish our shopping sometime today so we can go home and wash all those damned bowls you used to make breakfast?"

Roy stuck out his tongue and stood up. Fun was over. "Cooking isn't something that can just be condensed. It's art...it's science."

"It's a mess." She said and pushed her cart past the lemon man who was very focused on the fruit he was picking out. His whole damned basket was full of lemons. Who needed that many lemons? She focused instead on the oranges.

"Life is a mess. It's going to get even worse when Elicia starts walking and crawling. I'm helping you adjust to that." Roy said and walked back over to the apples.

"How thoughtful of you." Riza said. "However, you're supposed to help raise her and teach her good habits not exhibit bad habits she can learn."

"Pretty sure you're the only one in this produce section who would complain about me making a mess in your kitchen." Roy said and heard something drop. He looked over and saw the lemon man chasing after a runaway fruit rolling across the floor. He reached over and picked up a lemon and ran his thumb over the nub on the end, getting everyone's attention. Riza just shook her head. He smiled and set it back down.

Riza noticed lemon guy blush as Roy rubbed the lemon nipple like a fucking pervert. They were going to get kicked out of the damned store because of him! "Pretty sure people are going to start complaining in the produce section about  _you_  soon."

He held up his hand to advertise he was getting phone numbers for his antics. She gave him a look that said she wasn't impressed. Did she think it was easy to get a phone number from a lady buying cabbage? It's not like he could come right out and say 'I'm looking for good head...is this the best choice here?'. He watched Riza continuing to shop as if he wasn't being adorable and hilarious. Everyone was lingering here because of him! He huffed, took it as a challenge to get her to notice him and went over to the next bin of apples. He had to admit, he was having fun. Who knew grocery shopping could be fun? It was time for a change in tactics. "You know, if you plant the seeds out of these apples all you'll get is bitter crab apple trees? All producing fruit apple trees are grafted on."

Riza looked for non bruised tomatoes and didn't turn to look at him. "Yes. I was aware."

He liked that about her. She knew facts that he accepted as common knowledge but often found out was not. He held up a nice shiny red apple and said, "I think there is a lesson to be learned from nature. It goes to prove that a branch from a valued tree that can produce the most amazing fruit, can be transplanted into the most worthless tree of it's species and survive. It will make that tree better and eventually fuse with it and grow."

Riza picked up the tomato of her choosing and stared at it. The entire produce section was silent now. No baskets moving, no plastic bags crinkling. Was he really making a case for them being good foster parents with fruit analogies? Was it working? She chose to ignore him, this was the same man who had the potential to put his seeds all over Central and possibly end up with his own kid to tend to. Maybe that's why she was so upset by his habits? Was she really afraid he'd abandon her and Elicia?

"Nothing's perfect, the world's not perfect" Roy mused. "But it's there for us, trying the best it can; that's what makes it so damn beautiful."

She felt tingles as he said it and refused to look at him. The woman across from her stopped looking at the peppers and looked over at Roy, her jaw almost dropped to the floor. Lemon guy muttered something under his breath. There was something about Roy's voice, a dreamy far off baritone that sounded so genuine...so pure. The other shopper then realized she was looking past Riza and looked her in the eye briefly before looking down at the sleeping baby. She blushed, bagged her peppers and left. "It's a little hard to accept that ideology right now."

The way she said it, the matter of fact monotone, meant he had made an impact. He could accept that as a victory. He could hear Elicia waking up and knew that the time for the adults to play was over, and that Riza was now preoccupied with making sure the sleeping baby went back to sleep instead of exploded in high pitched wailing. His eyes scanned the end of the aisle, past all the nasty vegetables like kale and spinach, and he saw a end-cap with toys. He smiled as he saw toy guns and...a Fuhrer Bradley eye patch? Holy shit! They actually had licensed military merchandise for kids wanting to be the Fuhrer! He hurried over, pulled one off the shelf and opened it, put it on and waved at Elicia. "Riza, have you adequately checked those melons to ensure they are firm ,ripe and  _gluten free_?"

When Riza turned around she took one look at him and started laughing. She had to cover her mouth when other customers started staring at her. How the hell could this man go from some philosophical statement about apple trees to some hilarious Fuhrer impression in less than a minute? He came over to her and she had to pull the eye patch off to stop herself from making a scene. Elicia was going to wake up if she laughed. "Where did you find this!?"

He smiled at her. It was hard to not smile when she laughed. It was pure and a glimpse of who she really was when she left her defenses down. "They sell licensed merchandise. Kids can play dress up and be just like our fearless leader."

"What?" Riza said and he handed her the package. She couldn't believe she had never seen this before.

"They have guns and a sword too!" Roy pointed to the end-cap. "And uniforms!"

"We're not buying the baby a uniform!"

"Baby?" Roy scoffed. "I want to get one for the dog."

She shook her head and tried to hide her smile as she put the eye-patch back in the packaging. Elicia readjusted in her carrier and went back to sleep. She laid the eye-patch on the produce in the cart and sighed. "Now we have to buy it since you opened it and wore it."

"I'll keep that in mind." He said and she immediately glared at him knowing what he was thinking.

"I said we are  _not_  buying the uniform for  _my_  dog."

He frowned. "You're going to have to lighten up. I hate to break it to you but you're in for many years of dress up ahead."

"Not with the dog." She repeated and they moved on to the next aisle and proceeded to work their way through the store. She watched Roy fill the cart with things she would never consider buying but they had already agreed to only split the bill for Elicia's needs. She still marveled at how he just freely picked things up off the shelf without keeping a tally of cost. Maybe he was mentally preparing himself, but she doubted it. He must have noticed her watching him because he returned with a jar of something brown and looked like he was going to make a speech.

"Why is all the baby food..." He looked at the jar. "Gross?"

She looked at the label and it was for a blend of peas, zucchini and squash. "No worse than spinach quiche in my opinion."

Roy gasped. "We need to reevaluate you living in the Hughes household when we get home. How dare you speak ill of spinach quiche."

She grabbed the jar and went to put it back on the shelf where he found it. Playful Roy was fun, but now he was like a child picking up everything he could to see if he could get a reaction out of her. It was working and they were spending way way too much time at the food store. "Elicia isn't even ready for these yet. We need formula."

"I am doing research." He said proudly and pushed the cart over to the baby food section. "I am trying to prepare myself for when Elicia is old enough to consume blended varieties of disgusting and see what our options are. Like apple, pumpkin and...grandma."

She turned and looked at him, unable to hide her smile but somehow managing not to laugh. She reached over and grabbed the jar and huffed. "It says  _granola_  not grandma."

"Who would ever know?" Roy asked with a serious face. "Puree is a mean to hide things."

"Roy." She said sharply. "We are running out of time here. She has never slept this long. Get the formula."

He reached over and grabbed a box of baby formula and then he smiled as he saw the other items on the shelf. Loudly he asked, "Do we need any standard flow nipples or rings? Soft? Latex-free? Natural touch...are the nipples we have too small?"

She heard someone drop drop a box in the next aisle. Roy was unbelievable. Sternly she said, "Put the formula in the cart and go get diapers, now!"

"There's an anti-colic nipple." Roy gasped, this time for real. "Talk about a pair of tits I'm excited to get my hands on."

Riza walked over and got the diapers without looking at the price tag, then hit Roy with the package as she went to place it in the cart. "I'm not taking you shopping anymore."

"No..." Roy whined. "Riza, this is  _family_ time. Why are you going to deny me this valuable time with you and our baby?"

She didn't need to know someone was at the end of the aisle watching them. "I hate you."

"Well I  _love_  these nipples and I haven't even taken them out of the package yet." Roy said and turned the package horizontally and put it against his chest. He smiled at her and she looked ready to either start laughing or slap him. She elbowed him to get him out of the way and took control of driving the shopping cart. "On Monday I'm going to tell Mrs. Bradley about my new soft, supple nipples specifically made for eager sucklers."

Riza looked away from him and pretended to care about the pancake mix on special on the end-cap. "Is this how the next eighteen years are going to be?"

"Not if you bring that boxed pancake shit into our house!" Roy said and she turned and looked at him surprised. "Yeah, you heard me. You think that pancake you had this morning was store bought? You think something out of a box could satisfy you like I did this morning? I know the ingredients to making savory and unforgettable breakfast, in any shape or form you want and they sure as hell don't come in some complete mix with no eggs or milk needed."

"You know what?" She said as the other customers eyed him up and down and smiled. "I'll settle for you not splattering it all over the counter and actually hitting your mark."

He smirked at her and was about to make a lewder and better comeback when he watched her expression change. He turned to see who had just come out of the baking aisle. "Oh...hello. Major Miles, isn't it?"

"Hi." Riza said as the Major gave her a warm smile. He had probaby overheard them in the next aisle, not that it was difficult since Roy was being loud enough to be heard from the next city. She knew she didn't have to explain anything to him, Miles wasn't one to assume anything and that was something she very much appreciated about him. Unlike Rebecca or her Grandfather, both of which would have been planning a wedding if they heard how well she and Roy were getting along. Miles was one in a million. She realized not seeing him before she left was going to be harder than she thought, not seeing him again even worse. "Sorry, I should introduce you. This is Roy Mustang and Elicia Hughes."

Miles shook Roy's hand and circled around to look at Elicia. She looked like she was thinking about waking up but wasn't quite ready to give up on sleep. He put out a finger for her and she grasped onto it. "I've heard a lot of about both of you."

"I can imagine." Roy snorted. Olivier Armstrong wasn't his biggest fan.

Miles was careful not to do too much as Elicia was still wiggling around as if she was on the borderline of waking or sleeping. She seemed happy with the contact and gripped his finger and closed her eyes. "Yes, though I have to admit she's much cuter than Hughes lead us to believe."

Roy appreciated his tact. He could have brought up a statement from Olivier about him but chose to casually sidestep around it and talk about the baby. He could see what Riza liked about the man, and why Armstrong was so damned protective of her officer. "So, you're just here for the weekend, then?"

"Yes. I was simply an escort and I need to report back to Briggs Monday. When anyone comes to Central from Briggs we usually bring a shopping list. We're on the remote outskirts so there is a lot we can't get up there. I'm fulfilling requests of soldiers who just want a taste of home." Miles said as he explained the odd array of foods in his shopping cart.

"OK, well...I'll give you a chance to talk and I'm going to go get some baking supplies." Roy said as he took over the shopping cart, the list and the baby. He wasn't getting in their way, he could grill Alex Armstrong about it come Monday.

The Major waited for Mustang to leave and then said, "I don't leave until Sunday evening so I was hoping that you would like to have lunch with me?"

Riza knew it would be an opportunity to apologize for the previous night. She knew it would also be a good deadline for making a decision on her future, the last thing she wanted was to have a lingering alternative path available. It wasn't fair to anyone. "Yes. I'd like that very much."

"I'll pick you up around 11:00?" Miles asked.

Of course he knew where she lived now, since he had to take her home and deposit her on the couch last night. Not that she had a problem with him knowing where to find her, she just wished it was under less embarrassing circumstances. "That sounds great."

"I'll look forward to it." He said and went back to his shopping cart, trying to not make a scene in the grocery store since most of the shoppers were now confused by who the newcomer was in the drama theater performace Roy Mustang was creating for them today. He gave Riza once last warm smile and could see in her body language she was trying to not respond too favorably. He had one more day to convince her that the future she clearly wanted would be just as promising, if not better, for the child she vowed to care for. Especially since Mustang was doing everything in his power to prove to everyone here why he was the one needing adult supervision here.

"Me too." Riza let Miles return to shopping and went down the aisles to find Roy. He wasn't in the baking goods aisle, nor any aisle. How did he manage to disappear in just a few seconds? He was nowhere to be found. Then she heard Elicia crying and made her way to the front of the store. She saw Roy waving at her from the register and realized he had just taken all the groceries to the checkout and was in the process of paying for them. "Roy..."

"Elicia is ready to go." Roy said. It was a lie, she wasn't ready to go until someone had to come over to the baby and gush about her without asking. Fucking people needed to learn boundaries. He was already up here when it happened, he just wanted to get to the checkout before Riza saw the diapers cost a small fortune. He didn't want Riza denying herself something she needed because she had to buy the baby something to shit in. Not when he could afford it. He saw how she watched him pick up things while she bought things frugally and thought everything through. He also figured Miles would ask her out again and he didn't want her saying no because she blew her budget on groceries. He could see from the look on her face though, that she was pissed. So he opted to go with another lie, one she'd believe. "Look, not all the phone numbers I have are from women I look forward to seeing again. So it's time to call a retreat before I have to deal with one of them."

Riza sighed. That she could believe. She picked up Elicia and started to rock her back and forth hoping she'd go back to sleep. It was a lost cause, she was awake now. "I'll pay your my share of Elicia's things when we get home."

"Sure, why don't you let me take care of this and you can take her back to the car?" Roy asked.

Riza nodded. Elicia was screaming now and she just wanted to get her somewhere less disruptive. "Ok, make sure you don't lose the receipt. "

Roy watched her leave. It was a shame he was so bad about paperwork, he forgot to do it all the time and receipts looked a lot like paperwork.

* * *

"So," General Hakuro said and placed his chips in the center of the table before eyeing Mustang. "I hear Armstrong's Ishvalian officer was down here escorting contraband and took the opportunity to escort Hawkeye to dinner."

Roy waited for Grumman to say something, it was his granddaughter after all, but the old man just stared at him and smiled. "We're still living our separate lives. I guess I didn't make that clear enough last week."

"I believe the Major is only a quarter Ishvalian." Grumman said. "And I'd hate for someone to hold it against my granddaughter that I was her maternal grandfather so I'll have to caution you gentleman to tread lightly with your racial remarks."

Roy realized this was his opportunity to gather intel on Miles. Olivier Armstrong wasn't exactly big on sharing, especially not with him, it was going to take someone above her to pass on personel informarion. "Unique man, Miles, how did he end up so far from the East? How did he avoid being...reassigned during the war?"

"That's a guarded secret, but it's accepted that Armstrong never obeyed Order 3066 and instead made it well known that anyone coming to get her man would have to go through her first. " Raven said. "It's also a guarded secret that most of the top brass doesn't have to brass to go up against her and just was content to let her have the one Ishvalian she wanted to keep for herself."

"So now there's some competition?" Hakuro said and looked at Roy.

"Hardly." Roy said and put his chips in the middle. He left it at that. These two cared very little about listening to him.

"You're not pure Amestrian either, are you Mustang?" Hakuro asked.

Wasn't the first time he had been asked that, or more importantly, reminded of that. "My mother was from Xing."

"Well, it appears Miss Hawkeye has a type." Raven said and hummed as he played with his cards. "Might work out for you after all, Mustang. Odds are in your favor."

Roy really hated these two. He couldn't understand why Grumman was letting them gossip about his granddaughter like this. Then he saw it, that twinkle in the old bastard's eye that said he was waiting for Roy to defend Riza and maybe play the protective role here. He had too much respect for her to do that. So he played his winning hand and decided to just take their money and send them home early. "Yeah, it does seem odds are in my favor tonight. Royal Flush."

Grumman raised an eyebrow. That was a bold move, whether Roy wanted to think it was or not. Men of this rank did not like losing and Roy had been careful last week about not playing too competitively. It was the sign of an officer who had political promise, one who could keep his emotions in check and make a devastating play nobody was expecting. He folded his cards and put them down on the table, admitting defeat. Hakuro and Raven would have to cede this round to Mustang as well, that would keep them from getting too chatty about Riza or Mustang's heritage for a while. Well played, son, well played.


	9. Sacrifices

 

 

 

_Catalyst_

Chapter 9

**Sacrifice**

* * *

Riza was determined to wake up early, make breakfast and clean the house, however she realized most of her chores would probably wake Roy up. She wished he would stop sleeping on the couch and move to a bedroom, but that was a conversation for later on in their arrangement. Instead, she settled for making coffee and doing laundry in the basement and to thank Roy for doing more than his share with Elicia this week, she decided to do his laundry for him.

That didn't help make the next eighteen years with Roy look any more appealing as he seemed to have some aversion to using a hamper. The bathroom he claimed as his was on the first floor, had a small shower instead of the large tub the upstairs had, so she had somehow missed seeing this treatment of dirty laundry. She had to force herself to unclench her jaw as she picked up his clothes from the floor. He didn't ask her to come in here. He didn't ask her to do his laundry. He didn't ask her for her opinion on his living habits. They weren't married or dating. This was going to have to be another one of those things she learned to just ignore.

She felt through his pockets to make sure he wasn't leaving any vital information in them to be destroyed by the wash. Papers crinkled and she put her hand in his pocket to see what it was, assuming it would be a phone number. Instead she discovered yesterday's grocery bill! She put it in her own pocket so she could add up what she owed him and pay him when he woke up. Luckily she had won some money at poker last night and had some extra to spare. Clothes picked up and searched, she added them to her own basket to carry downstairs and start the laundry.

As she walked down the stairs she couldn't help but wonder if this was the lull of domestic bliss that Gracia enjoyed. Gracia was a caretaker, she thrived on providing the nurturing and services for her family. She would have never scolded Maes for being sloppy about his clothes after he got home from work. She would have dinner on the table, the baby ready to be loved on by her father and would silently work around them to clean up after the two. It was a family life Riza didn't have growing up as her Mom wasn't there and she had to play that role of caretaker to a Father who ignored her, his health and the house. Their attitudes were different, Riza felt like a servant and Gracia loved to serve.

Riza shook her head as she went to the washer and started sorting clothes. In her eyes, marriage was a partnership and professional courtesy should have been first and foremost on the priority list for the one you loved. She would expect her own husband to not treat her job any less than his and not make more work for her because he was too tired to place a dirty pair of pants in a hamper. How could a man be so observant that he could play a hand of poker, count cards and study his opponents, but still not see things as simple as where to put the silverware in a tray specifically designed to hold them?

He closed her eyes. No, she was just projected in her own annoyances with her co-guardian onto the Hughes's marriage. It was hard not to compare the two distinctly unique and different relationships to each other when they were living in the same house and raising the same baby. She and Roy were just roommates with a baby, that was not the same as a marriage. However she was really feeling like Roy was trying to take care of her since he was hiding grocery bills and also hit a losing streak last night in poker when she joined the game.

Roy Mustang, however, was still an enigma.

There were two sides of the man and she didn't know which one was real. There was the pretty playboy who drank himself into unconsciousness and had a notebook full of women he could call for a night of fun. Then there was the man who quickly and efficiently took on this new life with Elicia and was ready to fight a tiny old lady in the living room to keep the baby. The man who had made her laugh yesterday and made her wish she had given him a chance when Maes tried to set the up. So which man was the real Roy?

She looked up as she heard the floor creak and Hayate raced up stairs to see Roy as soon as he got out of the bathroom. She started the laundry and climbed back up to the main floor just in time to see the bathroom door open and Roy splash Hayate with some water from his hands. The pup immediately took off, running in circles around the kitchen and bouncing happily as Roy followed him to let him outside. Of course Roy was wearing nothing but lounge pants and she had to admire the view which didn't go unnoticed.

"What?" Roy asked and ruffled up his hair. " _Someone_  took my shirt when they picked up my clothes off the floor this morning."

It was tempting to make a habit of that. Riza shrugged. "Hard to tell what is dirty when it's all thrown on the floor."

"I thought it was  _my_  bathroom. I didn't realize I was going to have to deal with inspection, Lieutenant." Roy said and ran his hand over his chest to show he wasn't just referring to the old boot camp practice.

"I'm just hoping Elicia doesn't pick up any bad habits from you." Riza said and walked back in the kitchen to pour him a cup of coffee.

"So I have to pick up my laundry...when she can't even walk?" Roy asked with a smile. He was trying to be more conscious of his habits, he watched Riza go back over things he had done and fix them, but he could only change so many habits at once. He let Hayate out and walked back over to her and she handed him a cup of coffee, the prefect color of brown said she had added the right amount of cream and one sip told him the sugar was right too. He leaned against the counter and waited for an answer while he drank. He couldn't help but admit he liked waking up to someone else in the house. It helped him get out of bed, gave him a purpose and helped him be way more functional than he had been in years.

His smile said that despite looking tired and sleepy, he was in a mood for playful debate. She liked him, this Roy, and she hoped it was the real one. It was easier than expected to get comfortable enough to relax around him. Still, things needed to be addressed and she didn't want to skirt around issues with him. She still didn't know him well enough to expect honest answers if she confronted him about things. "Then do it for child services. I'm sure that lady you pissed off is going to be very focused on surprise visits."

Roy pouted, he was going to have to admit that was something he needed to consider. Those home visits could happen at any time. "I didn't feel like emptying my pockets when we got home. I just wanted out of my clothes and into the shower to try and get that cigar stench off me. If I threw it in the basket it would have been washed with stuff in the pockets."

Riza could understand that logic. Raven's cigar smoke permeated everything. "I found the grocery receipt. I'll add up what I owe you."

Roy sipped his coffee. So much for slipping that by her. At least he managed to 'lose' some money in poker last night to cover it. "As you wish."

Riza went to the back door to let Hayate in and said "I have a lunch date with Major Miles today. I'll take Elicia and Hayate with me so you can have the day off."

Roy watched as the pup came running in and ran around Riza's feet then bounced over to him. He swallowed his mouthful of coffee and couldn't help but feel like this was a test date to see if the boyfriend could handle kid and dog. He tried to dismiss the thought, Olivier would never let Miles transfer and Riza had a home here provided by Elicia's parents. He couldn't ignore it entirely, he saw it as a possible threat to his new role here as guardian, just as real as child services coming to deem him an unfit parent. At least he knew that Armstrong had already declared him incompetent. "Thanks."

* * *

Riza's curiosity about Gracia's domestic bliss was somewhat clarified at lunch with Major Miles. She and Roy had been so careful to keep duties separate and schedule days on and off that she forgot that the Hughes' shared in the responsibilities. A family didn't take turns doing duties, they didn't look at raising a child as a chore that had to be divided up between the individuals responsible for the baby's care. Elicia was the center of her parent's universe and she and Roy simply made decisions around Elicia instead of basked in her presence like the warm and life-giving sun.

When she arrived for lunch, Miles greeted her with a kiss to the cheek, gave her dog a biscuit and scooped the baby from her stroller into his his arms and showed he was an absolute natural with kids. The simple task of holding Elicia, something Mrs. Curtis had to lecture them how to do, was done without a second thought from the man who had no kids of his own. He held her like Gracia or Maes would and was excited to feed and tend to her for most of lunch. There was warmth in the way he looked at Elicia and held her and the baby responded to it. Riza noticed his focus was  _on_  her instead of  _reacting_  to her, which made sense. It was like training Hayate, best to notice him looking for a place to pee or play and take him outside than react to him having an accident. Miles was good with her, just Like Havoc, and it made her feel like this might be the day she didn't feel like she was letting Gracia down.

Time with Miles usually went by quickly, he was an engaging conversationalist and today was no different. There was small talk about gossip he had heard while visiting in Central and rumors about the regional training missions and eventually talk about Briggs. She appreciated how he brought it up, telling Elicia some stories about his home base and the people he worked with; stories about people she  _could_  work with if she would follow through with the transfer she put in for. She sighed and decided she had let this go on long enough. It wasn't fair to him. "I've made a decision about the transfer."

Miles could hear in her voice she was going to turn it down. "I'm not putting pressure on you, am I? I don't want it to seem like I'm trying to step in and take over this family you are trying to create for her."

Riza looked at him, he was trying to make everything so easy for her. Trying to step in and help with this child she was responsible for. Trying to help her rise above the reality of her sex holding her back at work. Trying so hard to make her want this life she had committed to  _with him_  instead of Roy. He would have made it easy, but that wasn't what life was about. "I have chosen to be Elicia's guardian and with that choice came some restrictions that keep me in Central. I will have to turn down the promotion offer."

Miles nodded. He understood duty. He wouldn't question that.

"I appreciate what you're offering...beyond the promotion and transfer." Riza said. "I am already in a tense relationship trying to figure out what I'm doing. I don't want that kind of pressure on  _us_. That being said, I don't want to leave our relationship with a promise of something I can't give."

"What we have was not contingent on you moving closer to me." He said softly. "We've both been very honest about what we have here and it's been very much seizing opportunities to be together when we are able. We both understood that a transfer was for your career and what we have...perhaps a bonus. The potential for something more for us is there, just like it's there for it to not work out at all. I would still like to have you as a colleague and friend if we couldn't make something more serious work out. I respect you and it does pain me to know that you're being held back, however I respect you all the more for this decision to put Elicia first. That being said, I would like to continue what we have until something develops that makes it no longer an option. I'm an adult, Riza, you don't have to try to protect me from that."

"I'm not sure if I'm making the right choice for her." Riza said quietly. "This decision was made by her parents and I have to try to see this through as they wanted. I have to believe they knew what was best for her. I have doubts..."

"I think the Hughes' had the best intentions but they certainly didn't consider all the factors involved in this arrangement past their daughter being in good hands." Miles said. "We all write our wills in boot camp, but it doesn't make an impact on us until we lose that first comrade. It doesn't mean anything until we see an empty seat or cot and know this was what we were preparing for. "

Riza sighed. It was the truth. The letters the Hughes' wrote were meant to be replaced by something more permanent. That was why they went to the lawyer, to work out the legal issues and discuss a more solid plan eventually. The letters were a placeholder, they were too hastily written to be anything else. They didn't expect to die this soon and were more than likely thinking about what the real letter would say when they returned to the lawyer for another appointment. It was an accident, not a terminal illness, there was no time to prepare. Still, this was no longer about them. "It's only been a few weeks. It's not fair of me to not give Roy a chance. My priority is Elicia and I regretfully have to decline the promotion and transfer. I put it in writing and I hope you will deliver it to General Armstrong for me? The mail room is the source of most of the gossip and I honestly don't want this complicating matters."

Miles gave her a warm smile. She resorted to being professional when she was questioning her resolve. "I will. So now can we enjoy lunch without worrying dancing around this?"

Riza relaxed a little and reached for her drink "Thank you."

"Speaking of dancing..." Miles said and raised an eyebrow. "I was hoping you might be my date to the annual North City ball?"

Riza blinked. That was a huge step in their relationship.

"It's just a date." He assured her. "Dinner, dancing...whatever you would like to do for the rest of the weekend. It's not for another two months. I just wanted to get in my request early so you could make arrangements in case you wanted to accompany me."

"Major." Riza said with a shake of her head. He knew exactly how to lower her defenses when she was getting ready to retreat behind them. "Sometimes I remember why you outrank me."

"I reserve those tactics for you, I know you appreciate them." He gave her a grin. "You're not an easy woman to try to get ahead of and you and I both know we should be a lot closer in rank."

Riza knew this would be hard, but he was making it damned near impossible to make a clean break. The man was too compassionate and dedicated to let her just give up her life to care for Elicia. He wasn't going to let her push him away, nor push those promotion papers into the trash. This was what she was not understanding when she was thinking about the Hughes's marriage earlier, even if they divided up duties they never accepted that it was going to be one individual's task to succeed or fail. Even if the promise of maintaining her own life on it's path looked impossible, there could be someone there who helped pull her through to the other side. It would have been easier if she didn't have that glimmer of hope, it scared her when she thought about it fading away over time instead of being extinguished in one quick move. "I'll think about it. I have a lot to adjust to in the next few months with Elicia in my life...I'll let you know."

"Well, we should be going. I don't want to miss my train." He said and reached for the bill but Riza quickly grabbed it and was getting money out of her purse. "Thank you for lunch, even though I asked you out. Will you see me off at the station?"

"I'd love to." Riza said and used the rest of the money she won at poker to pay for lunch. Seeing him off wasn't going to make her decision any easier as neither Miles nor Armstrong were keen on taking 'no' for an answer.

* * *

Roy was at a loss as to what to do with himself after he cleaned the house. He didn't realize how much he enjoyed spending time with Riza and Elicia yesterday until they left without him. He tried not to get a surge of emotion when Miles showed up to take everyone to lunch, but as the door closed and silence overtook the house it dawned on him that maybe he was getting used to not living alone. Once chores were done, he didn't want to stay at home. The empty house just made him feel like he was waiting on Hughes to come home so he quickly got dressed and left. Needing a task to keep himself from dwelling on thoughts too long, he opted to do some work on determining what he needed to do to get Child Services off his ass. Knowing only one person who could help him with that, he decided to go see his Mom.

Lunch time at Christmas's bar on Sunday was an interesting after-church crowd; People who felt obligated to confess their sins but didn't wait very long to commit more. He looked around, regulars all of them...except for one person. He was surprised to see someone in uniform at the bar on a Sunday, mainly because officers in Central mostly had weekday jobs and the ones who did not should not be drinking on lunch break. Roy's curiosity got the better of him and before he could duck away from the bar and into a booth, the man saw him in the mirror behind the bar.

"Mustang."

"Archer." Roy put on a fake smile. Addressing him without his rank was a intended insult and he intended to return it. Fucking Frank Archer, the last person he was expecting to see in this bar. Not because he thought it was beneath him, but because he seriously wondered if the man ever took breaks or ate. He walked over to him, there was no avoiding it now. Archer was in uniform, he doubted that he had civilian clothes, but on closer inspection he saw there was another star on his shoulder that wasn't there when he saw him last. "Nobody show up to your promotion party?"

Archer couldn't help but stare at himself in the mirror behind the bar and smile as he saw those three gold stars on his shoulder. "I'll celebrate my promotion by bringing order back to the streets of East City and eventually the entire Eastern region."

Roy hid his reaction by taking some peanuts out of the bowl in front of them and popping them in his mouth. Promotion to full Colonel?  _Archer_? Promoting him when there already was a full Colonel who was sitting in Central waiting on a command of his own? Of course the Fuhrer was well aware of his situation now and was involved in it. If he had been under consideration for the transfer, as he knew he was, then Bradley would have passed him over because there was something more important for him to do in Central: Public Relations. The eyes of the county were on him and Elicia, as Bradley had told him himself.

"I wanted a quick lunch before catching my train. This place wasn't going to have screaming kids and families." Archer said and then looked over at Mustang. "Something that doesn't bother you, from what I hear?"

"Maes Hughes was my best friend, I am honoring his wishes." Roy said. The fact that they were having this conversation in a bar and brothel was not lost on either of them.

Archer wasn't going to vocalize what everyone knew, that Mustang was the top candidate for the East City transfer and would have had a command of his own. Clearly the Fuhrer felt he was more useful being the hero who saved Maes Hughes's baby from the orphanage instead of returning him to the East as the Hero of Ishval. Good. It was his own time to make headlines. "Well, enjoy your new family. I'll be sure to quell the unrest in the East and make it a better world for your daughter to grow up in."

It was said with a smug smirk and a voice that sounded too much like a phony politician. Someone was already practicing his victory speeches. East City transfers were usually looked at as an exile, there was a lot of terrorist activity and racial tension that Central preferred to turn a blind eye to. The military was already feared and violence criticized, officers there tried to handle things quietly. More violence meant more danger for them and their families and many felt it was already a losing battle. Roy was looking forward to a transfer, not just for a regiment of his own and more responsibility, but because he felt there was a need for someone to actively seek out and destroy the terrorists groups and individuals perpetrating the violence. He knew Archer was of the same opinion, but was going to use far more forceful methods.

Roy hoped it would be a place he could make a name for himself, not just as a soldier, but as a leader and an officer who could use all the divisions at his disposal to reduce the potential damages and death toll. Intelligence and undercover work, in addition to improving public relations, were key to removing and preventing groups like this from wreaking havoc. Archer was going to go in and use force, alienate the populous further and increase resentment. He actually got more upset from the statement that Elicia would have a better world because of him than anything. So he didn't really feel bad dropping the pleasantries.

"I forget you weren't deployed to Ishval. You remind me of the new recruits that were excited to board that train in Grand Central Station and head East to war. " Roy smirked as he saw Archer's grin disappear. It was a sore point for the man that he had 'missed out' on the war, clearly he was planning to rectify that by starting his own. He wouldn't get too far, his superiors would have to answer for any large scale damage he caused. Still, it could have been him. It  _should_ have been him. The path to General was not paved with paperwork. "It's not as easy to put a positive spin on news when the public is around and affected. I'm sure your superiors out there will educate you on those matters. Good luck."

Madam Christmas watched and listened and when Roy went over to a booth she went over to take his order. "I assume you came in here for something other than finding out you were passed over for a promotion."

Roy glanced up at her. "Just a transfer. I'm already a Colonel."

"Mmm."

"We're being put into play at the same time for a reason, I will counteract his bad press. The Fuhrer is a smart man, he doesn't make a move without balancing it out somewhere else. He's using me as a distraction for whatever he's giving Archer license to do out East. Fortunately, I happen to play poker with three rather high ranking Generals who tend to be rather receptive to my input after a few drinks. I can do damage control without leaving Central." He opened the menu as if he wasn't the one who created it and stared at it while he tried to find the right words. He was confident he could pull this off, even if that transfer slipping through his fingers stung quite a bit. He tried to maintain that confidence as he said, "I'm sure there will be other opportunities, however right now I need to focus on Elicia and I was hoping you could help me with that."

"Roy..." Chris knew it was an act. He'd been working on that transfer for a while, making plans to take a step towards his grander plans of changing things in Amestris. She knew because he had used her information network to see what strings he needed to pull and what people he needed to win over in order to secure a position out East. This was a setback and it was going to be harder to swallow knowing he was passed over because he had a family now. The family thing was going to be harder because he had been passed over for the position. She hoped he knew what he was doing.

Roy smiled. His Mom was more uncomfortable with the baby than he was. "I'm not asking for baby advice, I need some information about a woman who works for Child Services. A little background on her could help me understand what I need to do to figure out her resentment of the military."

She watched him pull a business card out of his pocket and slide it over to her. "Twenty five years later and I'm still having to deal with Child Services because of you."

Roy huffed. "I'm not 30... _yet_."


End file.
